Ain't This Life So Sweet | Joanne

Chapter Ten

"OK, little miss. Are you ready to go? Do you need a wee or anything? This is your final chance to say before we get on the road." Dianne made sure Emelia was listening. She had learned early on in her parenting journey to always check at least fifteen times whether a child had actually considered going to the toilet before leaving for a long drive.

"I'm sure."

Joe smiled as he heard Dianne use the same line his own mum had used every time they had been in the car as kids. "Can you go into the bathroom and try, please?"

He picked up the rest of their bags and walked out to the car. Climbing into the driver's seat, he turned on the car's display screen and flicked through the options until he found what he was looking for.

Emelia and Dianne appeared a few moments later. Dianne fastened her daughter into her seat and walked around to get in on her own side.

"Emelia?" Joe turned around to look at the little girl, who was dressed in blue denim dungarees, pink boots, a striped t-shirt and a black, fluffy jacket just like her mum's.

"Yeah?"

"Do you want to see something cool? Look at the back of my seat."

Joe fiddled with the screen in front of him until he heard Emelia gasp. "It's a TV?" Joe still hadn't got over how adorable her little Aussie accent was.

"Yep. You can choose. I've got Trolls, The Little Mermaid or Minions."

"Trolls! Trolls! Trolls!" Emelia shouted. Dianne turned to face her, giving her a serious look.

"Please?" She reminded her daughter.

"Trolls, please Joe."

"Good girl. Thank you." Dianne smiled softly as she watched Emelia bounce excitedly in her seat.

Joe selected the movie and passed Emelia a pair of headphones. "Here you go. Check you can hear it OK. You can turn it up or down here" he pointed out the buttons on the side. "Enjoy your in-flight entertainment."

Emelia put on her headphones and settled into her seat. Dianne looked across at Joe, smiling.

"Are you trying to win back her affection after she brushed you off for your dad?"

Joe shrugged. "Maybe. Or maybe I wanted to listen to something other than The Greatest Showman for an hour or so."

Dianne chuckled. "Listen. After three years of Frozen, I'm more than happy that she's finally changed things up. Maybe in another three years, it'll be something else again".

They sat in silence for a few moments, both enjoying the novelty. Dianne was the first to speak.

"I'm so glad things went well with your family. Everyone's been so nice. To both of us. Do... do they really feel alright about all of this?"

Joe wasn't exactly sure what Dianne meant by 'all of this', but he reached across for her hand and squeezed it reassuringly. "They love you. They adore Emelia. And I think they can tell that this is probably the happiest I've ever been. They know that it's all down to you. Both of you."

Dianne smiled softly. "That's alright, then."

Joe went back to focusing on the road. He had been thinking about a lot of things over the last day or so, but he wasn't sure when would be the right time to bring any of it up. Deciding it was now or never, he took a breath.

"So, you know yesterday when we talked about childbirth and babies and stuff?" Dianne turned to him slowly, not sure where his conversation was about to go. "I was just thinking about something you said. About how Emelia would need to be living with you permanently again before you'd have another baby. Wh... when do you think that would happen?"

Dianne leaned back in her seat. It was a question she pondered pretty regularly.

"I don't know. I mean, Strictly is great but it's only half the year and the hours are crazy. At the moment, I spend the rest of my time on tour. I couldn't really do that if she was with me, which is why she stayed behind. I couldn't not work, not dance, but maybe if something closer to home came up, I'd be able to do it. I'd just feel so guilty if I moved her all the way over here and then left her with a babysitter every single day. Not to mention I couldn't really afford it."

Joe listened carefully to what Dianne was saying. He took a moment to think before he responded. "It's just... OK. I'm not saying this as in 'let's go for it right now' but hear me out. I was just thinking that my job is pretty flexible. Like, I am essentially my own boss. I only travel when I want to and I work from my own house. So, if we're stable in a few months, or next year even, would that be enough? You could go and tour and she'd be safe at home with me."

Dianne smiled. "Maybe. There's a lot to think about, Joe. We've only been together a few months. And I know we're serious, but anything could happen. And Emelia would need to have a say in it, too. She might not even want to leave Australia. We'd have to give her time to get used to the idea. I've been out here two years and this is the first time she's visited."

Joe nodded along.

"Ok," he began, "so maybe we start small. Maybe we do this again. You have a break, right, in your next tour? May, I think?"

Dianne thought for a moment. "Yeah, I'm definitely not touring on my birthday."

"So how about we do the same thing? But we go over to Australia and spend some time with your family first? Bring her back with us?"

"I'd have to check whether it would fit with her school holidays, but that sounds good."

Joe smiled. "We can take baby steps. But I'm serious about wanting to help you out. I absolutely adore her. As much as I adore you. And you belong together. Not on opposite sides of the planet."

///

Dianne laid awake for the third night in a row. Jet lag was horrible, and jet lag whilst parenting a sassy six-year-old was even worse.

As she laid listening to Joe's gentle breathing, she thought back to their earlier conversation. She could tell Joe was deadly serious about supporting her to move Emelia to the UK. He knew how much she missed her daughter, and how much it would mean to be able to be together all the time.

Leaving Emelia in Australia had been the hardest decision Dianne had ever had to make. She had sobbed continuously for the entire flight over after she had kissed her four-year-old goodbye at the airport. Her parents had been absolutely amazing in supporting her to follow her dreams, but it had almost torn her in two to leave her little girl like that.

Emelia was getting to an age where she was beginning to understand more about Dianne's job. It wouldn't be long before she began asking difficult questions about why Dianne had chosen to leave, and why she had put more importance on being a dancer than on being a mother. Dianne didn't have the answers. She wasn't sure she ever would. She could only hope that Emelia would understand one day.

She was also bracing herself for Emelia to begin asking questions about her dad. Every other kid had two parents. Even if they had separated, most of Emelia's friends knew who their parents both were. It was going to be an awkward conversation, and- when she had been single- she had found it really difficult when people looked at her as if they judged her for being on her own with a small child.

Joe had changed everything. Dianne had trusted him enough to introduce him to Emelia. She knew her daughter already thought he was great. It was early days, and she didn't expect Joe to step up and fill the dad-shaped hole in her daughter's life, but this was the first time she had ever been with someone who she thought would be up to the job. She had made sure Emelia was surrounded by male role models, men she knew would set a great example to her daughter and would support her with anything. But Joe was the first, the only, person she could see herself actually raising a child with. The only person who could make her consider moving her child halfway across the world so that they could all be together.

She rolled over and watched as Joe breathed gently. Moving closer to him, she snuggled herself against his chest. Instinctively, he wrapped an arm protectively around her and moved his head so that she was tucked underneath his chin. "You have no idea how much I love you, Joseph" she thought to herself.

Closing her eyes, Dianne sighed deeply as she finally fell asleep.