|| LONGING || EDITTING

|| Chapter Twenty - Nine ||

[ Warning | Self Harm ]

The video was abruptly cut off with static on the screen and black and white shifting along with the screen. Peter was sat beside Arizona, having watched the memory fold out before them as though it happened yesterday, Arizona stared at the black and white screen with tears in her eyes the sympathy toward Peter hitting her hard at the fact that she hardly remembered it and he remembered every second of it. Arizona slowly and silently placed the camera down to her left, Peter sitting on her right and wiped at her eyes before sitting up straight whilst looking ahead of her, "Why didn't you tell us you were alive?" His voice was hushed, his words hardly coming out over his break as he was hunched over with his elbows resting on his knees, propping her his chin as he kept his eyes anywhere but Arizona.

Said redhead closed her eyes, letting out a breath of defeat before opening them again, "I wasn't ready..." Peter turned his head to give her an incredulous look, "I know," She raised her voice slightly, her tone changing as she made it obvious, "I know it's no excuse, but you don't understand, it's -"

"Understand?" Peter cut her off, before standing up, whipping to face her with furrowed brows and anger twisting his features, "I don't understand? You are the one who doesn't understand, Arizona," She went to speak but Peter continued, "You don't understand what it was like to mourn your best friend every year, to breathe every day and wish that that one person you loved was beside you -"

Arizona joined him in standing up, "You make it sound like we've known each other for years!" She exclaimed, "You talk about our friendship as though we're older than we actually were!" She pinched her brows together, slightly leaning forward, "Get it through your thick skull that we were only five when we were best friends! No kid remembers anything from that age!

"I do,"

Arizona stood up straight, Peter's anger having suddenly disappeared and a troubled expression was painted across his face, his voice thick with grief and deep with restraining anger. She parted her lips as she looked at Peter with guilt, "I remember everything," He stepped toward her, "I remember every day I spent with you because it was the best I ever was before my parents died," He clenched his jaw, "And then you,"

The pain was evident in Peter's words, the desperation they held to get Arizona's attention, and not in the way she was giving him the attention now, but the attention that alerted her of how much her being dead had impacted everyone, Peter was hoping she would admit to her family that she was alive because if he was bearing so much pain, then their agony must've been excruciating. Gulping, Arizona glanced away from him, not bearing to feel his heated gaze on her skin before she looked back at him, "I'm sorry for your loss," Her voice gentle.

"No," He suddenly gave her a stern look, "You don't get to be sorry," He snapped, he crossed his arms, "Seven years," He stated fiercely, leaving Arizona to clenched her fists as tightly as she could, her closing her eyes for a split second as she felt the warm substance slowly trickle down her fingers before opening them again, "We mourned you for," He then raised his voice, "Seven years!"

Arizona locked her bottom lip nervously, "Peter, please," She whispered.

"Every year I visited your grave," He looked solemn, "Every year I - I cried," His voice cracked, tears sparkling his eyes, red rings around his eyes as Arizona felt a weight pressing against her chest and closing up her throat, "And all of it was for nothing," He sneered, trying to ignore the fallen tears, he then shook his head, sniffling as he stepped back, "We all suffered just so you could stay with Mr Stark all this time,"