Jack Avery | Secret Love 2

5.

Taylor's P.O.V

• flashback to 5 years ago •

"The bad news?" I said as a tear dropped out of my eye, already preparing for the worst. "Ok well, I'm so so sorry to inform you Miss Paul but the baby has... passed away" the doctor trembled on knowing I was about to be an emotional wreck.

My body was numb. Everything was a blur. I couldn't stop the tears that were pouring out of my eyes and the painful noises that were escaping my mouth as I thought about mine and jacks precious little soul, that I have killed.

This is all my fault.

"Oh Tay" I faintly heard Corbyn whisper as tears escaped his eyes as well, I looked around the room at the other boys as I continued to cry heavily and saw them shedding their own tears as well.

"I'll let you have some alone time" the doctor said with an 'I'm sorry' look written all over him.

I've let Jack down. Will he even care?

We we're on our way home from the hospital and I was sitting in the back seat next to Daniel, Zach was on the other side of him, Corbyn in the passenger seat and Jonah driving.

The whole trip home consisted of me looking out the window and watching the rain splatter onto the glass. The only thing I could think of was the baby, how could I? Even though I say it would've been hard having the baby in our lives, we would have loved it like no other.

When we arrived back at the boys' house everyone got out except for me, I was frozen. Jonah came around and lifted me out and helped me walk inside, God help Jack if he's inside right now.

Zach opened up the door and we walked in, the boys all went into the kitchen and I walked Into the living room and collapsed onto the couch. The boys came back with bottles of water and handed me one and sat down on the couch with me.

"We truely are sorry Tay" Daniel said as he put his head down, "it's fine guys, it wasn't your fault. It was no ones fault but mi-" just before I could finish my sentence the front door bursted open making a loud noise.

It was him. The last person I wanted to see right now, better yet he was drunk and I could smell the alcohol from here. The boys and I watched him enter the house, anger within all of us. I have never felt so mad and so humiliated in my entire life.

He trembled into the house and closed the door behind him "baby! There you are! I have to show you something come on" He said hardly getting the words out of his mouth as he stumbled more towards the living room.

I walked up and slapped his face as hard as my brittle self could, "don't you fucking call me that Avery!" I spat as I slowly backed away from him and pointed my finger at him. The boys quietly went upstairs but I could tell they were still watching, Jack stopped where he was and looked at me in shock, with his eyes wide and and his hand holding his cheek.

"What the fuck was that for!" he said confused, "are you kidding me Jack? You reek of alcohol! Your a low life, self centred person that doesn't care about anyone else but himself. You don't fucking care about me! You never cared about your son! Heck you probably don't even care about your career, since your ruining it anyway. I tried to help you, WE tried to help you. We put our lives aside to try and fix your problems, but let's all be honest Jack, they can't be fixed. Your an alcoholic Jack, and you were never going to raise this kid properly. I can't believe I ever thought you were ready to have a child" I shouted one last time as tears were streaming down my face, my knees felt weak and I dropped to the floor in agony.

"He's gone Jack. Our baby boy, he's gone." I cried and cried onto the floor, I was a wreck. Jack stood there in shock tears falling down his cheeks yet, not showing any emotion.

"What?" he softly said as his tears got heavier and eventually turned into crying. He flopped his head back and held his hands over his face, he let out a scream as he punched the wall next to him.

I looked up at him, he was now an emotional wreck too. "Oh don't act like you wanted this baby" I managed to get out under all the tears, "ohh no no no don't you dare try and fucking blame this on me! I wanted this kid just as much as the next one and the next one, but your too fucking blatantly blind to see that cause nothing's ever your fault, is it Taylor?" He yelled.

"Not that you would have any idea because you never asked, but yes, I was so fucking excited to be a dad. I don't know if I was ready, but I was certainly fucking happy! You never once asked me how I felt Tay. You always just assumed and made accusations about me and I hated it! You made me feel like I was fucking useless!" He said calming down as he wiped the tears off his face.

He began walking over to me as I got up off the ground, hardly standing I spoke back "no, DON'T come near me" I said gritting my teeth in anger. "I don't ever want to see you again Jack. Don't you fucking call me, don't text me, don't have any connections with me at all. Do you understand?" I said with a calm voice but anger clearly overpowered that.

"Taylor? You don't mean that baby" He said letting more tears out as he stepped closer and reached his hand out to touch me. "I said don't fucking touch me!" I yelled as I hit his arm away.

Everything was silent for the next few seconds and we both starred at the ground wiping our tears away, "I'm packing my stuff and leaving Jack, I just, need some alone time for a long, long time. We both do, we've both been through so much the last couple weeks and we just need it" I said softly.

"I love you so much Tay you don't understand" he said with sympathy, "I don't know if I can go without you for a long long time" he said putting his hand out.

"Jack. Please" I said as I grabbed his hand and gave it back to him. I turned around and walked up stairs to our room, Jack following closely behind me.

I shoved my clothes and straightener into my suitcase, along with my shoes and laptop. "How long is a long long time" he whispered with a tear as he sat down on the end of the bed and watched me.

I stopped what I was doing and turned around to face him, he was a mess. "Okay, listen" I said as I sat down next to him and put his hands in mine, holding onto them tightly. He rested his head on my shoulder and wiped away his tears.

"I don't know exactly how long a long time is but what I do know is that I need to get my life on track, and being here with you guys doing whatever I want is not helping. I love you to bits but, I have a dream, I have a dream to model and have a successful career. No one will ever replace you Jack your always going to be my first love but it has to end for now okay" I said trying to fight back my tears.

"I'm sorry Tay. I'm so so sorry" he managed to get out as he trembled on his words. We sat there in silence for a little bit before Jack finally spoke up, "come with me" he whispered as he grabbed my hand and left the room.

• end of flashback •