Home for the Unwanted

Chapter 3

I'm on my bed right now, staring up at the perfect ceiling in this perfect house.

Ur! I hate this place! I feel like I wanna just kick something! I swear if I stay here for any longer I'm gonna go insane!

I sighed. One long sigh.

Why did this have to be so hard?

Maybe it's my fault. Maybe I should've just left things the way they were. Then I wouldn't have been thrown into this storm. I'm sort of half waiting for my parents to come up. So they could judge me again. Or yell at me. Ether way for me the future didn't look bright.

I don't even think I have any mental strength to get off the bed. I was just to sitting there and thinking. I feel like I'm gonna faint, or vomit, or both.

I looked around my room, sure as hell a boys room alright. It's not like I ever asked for this. I just felt a sort of feeling one day that this is what I wanted to be. This can't be all my fault. I mean, not all of it. I don't even know who I am anymore.

So my parents don't think they can love me? Well I don't think I can love them, I'm being honest. Maybe I'm overeacting, but I've never felt like I'd been close to them. They were always so distant to me. They weren't my mum and dad anymore. They're just...people who I know. Home isn't home anymore. Home is meant to be warm, safe, kind. It never was that.

This was...it was...
Nothing.

It was all nothing to me. I didn't even want to be here. I had no need to be here. I was wasting my time here. I'm nothing to gain staying here.

Then if that's the case what am I to do? Well...
I've always dreamed of just getting away from it all...

I could just walk out the door and leave, tell my parents that I've had enough. But they'd probably call the police to try to bring me back. Plus, I'd have no money or anything. Well what's another escape route? My window? Suppose so. It wasn't that high and I could easily fit though it, and my parents weren't coming up for anytime soon so that buys me time to get far away and also give me time to pack up a bag.

Wait hang on...

I'm really considering this? I mean...
well...

Running away from home is a big step. I know it's not as glamorous as everyone says it is. Sure you've got freedom but living on the streets can be hard, cold and dangerous.

But your forgetting,
I'm not even welcome here. I've always felt like I was a guest in my own home.

Home, yeah if you can even call it that.

It's not like anyone would be heartbroken if I leave. I know my parents wouldn't. I have no siblings that'll miss me. The rest of my family like my aunts and uncles don't even care about me. In my opinoin theyre all dicks, every single one of them. I have no meaningful friends here or at school and no one like my teachers care if I'm there or not. So I'm not really losing anything.

Yeah, I've had enough of all this shit.

I was so worried about how people will perceive me. Why? Why did I give a fuck about them? The answer has literally been there all along: Just be yourself:

My name is Thomas, I've just turned fifthteen. I'm questioning right now but that's ok and I want to be a dancer when I'm older because dancing is my favourite thing to do.

 Now that's who I am.

                                ▪▪▪

I had found an old grey and black dusty duffel bag at the bag at the back of my closet. I thought this one would be perfect to put my stuff in because it was bigger inside than it looked on the outside. Firstly I put in my large toiletries bag in with everything I need. Just the basic essentials: A toothbrush, toothpaste, soap, shampoo and conditioner all in one bottle so I had less to carry. Then I packed some clothes: a pair of leggings, a pair of jeans, two old t-shirts, seven pairs of underwear and four pairs of socks. I wore my hat and my jacket when changing into more suitable clothes. Then lastly I packed a warm lightweight blanket, because you never know what's going to happen, and my huge studies book. At least I could have some education...

A.N
Hey!
Sorry if it's been a bit boring, I'm pretty sure the rest of the characters will be introduced in the next chapter.
Vote, comment and everything else.

Nelly Xx