Stay With Me (COMPLETED) ✓

4 : Unusual

I woke up again. I dream it again. I remember it again. Well, of course. It's past. I can still remember them.

I keep dreaming it everyday. It bothers me everyday. I still didn't tell it to everyone, including Jimin. I'm sure he'll be worried so I decided not to tell.

The only one who knows is my psychiatric. Yeah, I've been visiting it since the day my phobia attacks.

I'm on the sink again. I opened the cabinet and find the pill.

Forget pill.

"Just remember the memories you want to forget and drink the pill. You will notice the changes." Said my psychiatrist. I shut my eyes.

My anxiety. I feel it again. My panic attacks. I feel it again. My difficulty in breathings. I feel it again. My difficulty in sleeping. I feel it again.

My hands tremble when I opened my contact list on my phone.

Jagi   
Dial  |  Message

Mr. Go (Psychiatrist)
Dial  |  Message

I fight the urge to dial Jimin's number. No, Jisoo. Don't let him know.

I shut my eyes when a tear escaped my eyes.

Mr. Go (Psychiatrist)

Composed Message:

It attacks again. What should I do?
Message Sent ✓

7:56 AM
Unread Messages (1)

Mr. Go (Psychiatrist)

Mr. Go (Psychiatrist): Drink the medicines I give you

I sighed. Tears still flowing endlessly. I eyed the containers. I just need to get rid of this.

I opened the container and poured the pills on my hand. I eyed myself on the mirror. My eyes are already puffy and has a shade of red.

I didn't bother to think twice. I quickly poured it to my mouth and drink a glass of water.

I hold on the sink tightly as my throat makes way to make me feel the pain. It hurts.

My pain baldly showed on my reflection on the mirror. I can't breath.

My knees started to throb causing me to fall on my knees. I touch my neck, suppressing the pain it giving me.

I whimpered. But, minute later the pain suddenly fade away and my breathings became clear. I touch my chest. The feeling.

"It will just bring pain on you but soon it will relieves you." I remembered Mr. Go's words. It pains. It hurts. But one thing for sure, it wipes my problems after.

I heaved a breath. I slowly stand up. Look at my reflection at the mirror as if nothing happened and smiled. Right, A simple smile is the starting point of a good day.

I exit the bathroom, already settled. But a messy room greet me. I forgot. I caused mess last night.

My bed mattress was not properly placed on the bed. My lamp was laying on the floor, it's glass was already scattered everywhere. My books on the bookshelves was scattered everywhere. My pillows were everywhere.

It's a mess.

I sighed. I'll never let them see this mess.

I cleared it right away.

I sit there quietly when I heard a knock coming from the door. I quickly stand up and walked towards the door. I slowly opened the door and peeked outside the door.

It's Jennie.

"Oh! Why?" I tried hard to sound cheerful and hyper. I smiled. But she didn't response on my smile. She just look at me with her kind and worried look.

"U-unnie, b-breakfast is ready." She said softly. Looking at me with her unpredictable gaze.

I opened my door widely so that she can see my whole body. I saw how her eyes gaze at my room before mine. I saw a glint of sadness on them but I just thought that maybe I'm just fantasizing. I smiled from ear to ear and wave my hand on her face to caught her attention.

"Why are you stuttering, Jennie-ah?" I asked,  pinching her cheeks. She just shook her head. "Nothing."

"Let's go. The maknaes are already on the dining area." I nod and followed her.

But silence greet me. Seriously? Something is wrong here. Chaeyoung and Lisa are quietly sitting at the stool.

Usually, Lisa was loud and chaeyoung is the one who'll scold Lisa for being noisy.

But no, they're sitting quietly across the table and seems waiting for us to arrived.

I put my thoughts aside and act like the normal me.

"Good morning, maknaes!" I said cheerfully before sitting at the stool next to Lisa. I looked at the table. The foods were just a usual breakfast. Like ham,  bacon, fried rice and milk.

I looked at them. They're quietly munching the food. It's awkward. I looked at the flat screen TV ahead us. It's off.

There's something unusual here.

Usually, the TV was always on when we're eating breakfast. And Lisa.... She's always talking even if her mouth is full. But now, she's peacefully eating the food.

It's so unusual.

I didn't touched my food. I just look at them, confused.

I stand up. Walking towards the TV to turn it on, to throw the awkwardness away.

Just when my hand was about to reached the remote. Lisa spoked.

"Unnie! Don't open the TV!" She said, widening her eyes. I furrowed my eyebrows. "Why can't I?" They didn't answered.

I looked at each of them. Jennie, Lisa and Chaeyoung. But they avoid my gaze.

I know them. If they're like this, something was off.

"What's wrong!?"

~×~