Lights. (An AJR fanfic)

Chapter 15

I HAVING A FAVOURITE SONG CRAVING OKAY SHUT UP.

SO MY FAVOURITE SONGS EVER ARE:

BE REASONABLE DIANE BY SPEAK

UPRISING BY MUSE

STARLIGHT BY MUSE

HEAVY METAL WARS BY SPEAK

UNDISCLOSED DESIRES BY MUSE

·····

I don't know if I actually fall asleep, but if I do, I feel Jack with me the whole time.

I open my eyes to nothing newer than a blue bathroom, but I can still feel jacks fingers numbly pulling on different strands of my hair, slower than before, but just as comforting. I slowly move my head up to see the bottom of his head. He looks dead, like he did in that dead end hallway so many nights ago, his eyes focused on the future instead of the present, his mind probably going either a million miles a second or as slow as my hangover recovery.

"Jack," I whisper, and I remember saying his name when we were what? walking from the pub? I can't remember what we were doing but I remember his name. Suddenly I feel queasy. Guilty? Annoying? Scared? I don't know why this feeling is here, but it's weird and I want it to go away as much as I want it to stay.

He slowly looks down at me, a small smile playing on his lips, a fucking twinkle in his eyes. That alone makes me smile back at him, and I want to stay there and just look at him smiling and looking at me, but I know we have to do something today.

"I was just checking to see if you were okay," I say, hoping I didn't ruin the moment by speaking.

"I'm alive," he says, and I can't help but admire the way he says those words, as if he owns them in general. His voice is much more raspy than usual when he's tired, and I'm left to wonder what time it is.

"It's almost dinner time, in case your wondering," Jack says as if he's read my mind.

"Thank you," I whisper. I move my head back to his chest and this time I wrap my arms around him and shuffle around so that I'm closer. I feel vulnerable, but it's comfortable, and I find that the more time I spend with him, the less I care. Thats how I became friends with Kari, I just stopped caring what she thought of me. And Jack was just so kind, so comfortable, so differently normal that I can't help it. Normally I wouldn't get close to people. It's awkward and I don't like people. But I know I like Kari, and I think I like Jack.

"So, your really seventeen?" I hear Jack ask in his tired, raspy voice. I can feel him talking through his chest, and if I press my ear closer, I can hear his heart beating.

"Yeah, shut up," I say. I always was the youngest girl in my classes at school because my birthday is in January, and I cheated and started school when I was four anyway. I didn't feel like getting teased again, plus I liked hearing his heart beat.

"Why?" He laughs, and I have to move my head again to see him clearer. He looks super tired but happy at the same time, and I have to smile back.

"I was born in January. Technically I should still be in school, but because my family was a dick family I started school in a different province that had.. Flexible timings.." I say, not really sure what to call it.

"January? So you'll be eighteen in four months?" He asks. I nod my head.

"How old are you, anyway? Kari's probably told me before but, you know," I grin.

"I'm nineteen now. My birthdays in August," he says.

"You're only like a year and a half older than me," I state. Usually band members I like are like, fifty years older than me. Oops.

"How old did you think I was?" He asks, a sly smile on his face. I leaned further back, wanting to see his next reaction.

"Twelve," I say as seriously as I can. He laughs so hard he closes his eyes and throws his head back, and I instantly wish I can make him laugh like this more often.

"Well, I thought you were eighteen if that makes you feel better," he says. I grin at him because it does make me feel better, in a way.

"Oh my god. Kari's older than you," I say, laughing. Kari hated boy bands, unless every member was older than her. She didn't, for some weird reason, believe in dating younger boys. Maybe she was after Ryan, I never really got to know.

"How olds she?" Jack asks, confused.

"She's nineteen too, but her birthdays in March," I explain.

"So she's two years older than you?" He asks, bewildered.

"And seven years older than you," I smirk, and he smiles.

"Hmm," he hums. I put my head back on his chest, searching for his heart beat again without really knowing it.

"So. Phantom of the opera tonight?" He asks. I giggle, and my first thought is, why the hell did I just giggle? And my second thought is, I've never giggled before, much less over opera theatre shows.

"I was thinking Mama Mia," I say, grinning again. I'd love to make these three boys sit through that.

"What about the lion king?" He counters, and his voice is hinting at this being the final offer.

"Hmm. Lion King," I decide. I've never really seen the movie as a kid, so why not?

Jack laughs, agreeing with me.

"Are you okay to get up now?" He asks, somewhat shyly. Shyly? Jack shy?

"Yeah, I only still have a tiny headache but I can take Tylenol for that," I say, and I start to get up. He helps me stand, taking my arm. Once I'm fully standing and declaring I was okay with two thumbs up, he grins at me and puts his arm across my shoulder.

*_*_*

Annd since wattpad decided that it didn't want the rest of this chapter, I decided to stop rewriting it over and over again just to have it deleted every time. So basically all that's missed here was a bit of foreshadowing about producers and men in suits and stuff. Nothing big. For now. ;)