Marry me (book 3)

Chapter 8 - why?

It's been a day. I'm at the hospital, Shawn is sitting on the chair next to the bed I'm in, He is asleep.

I woke up, with no one except Shawn in the room. It felt weird. My stomach hurts.

"Good morning" the doctor walks in the room. "How are you feeling?" He asks.

"I'm fine," I say. I feel weird, but fine. "Does your stomach hurt?" He asks.

"Yes, a bit."

"If you really want we can give you painkillers." He offers.

"I think I'll manage, thank you" I say.

"As you wish" the doctor says and he writs something in his notebook. A few seconds later he just walks out of the room.

I lie down, I feel so weird. What happened? I can't remember.

I see a cup of water next to the bed on a tray with an apple and a banana and I drink a bit from the water.

"Hey.. are you ok? How are you feeling?" Shawn woke up, and he looks so worried. It was sweet. "I'm fine" I say putting the cup of water back on the tray.

"Are you still hurting?" He asks. "No." I answer.

Shawn looks relived that I'm not hurting, "how do you feel?" He asks.

"I'm really fine" I say. I don't know how else I'm supposed to feel, am I supposed to be happy? sad? disappointed? Frustrated, maybe?

"Are you sad?" He asks. What?

"What do you mean?" I ask. As I say those words, shawn looks at me differently, he raises his brow at me, and he asks, "what do you mean what do you mean?"

What is the supposed to mean shawn?

"You asked me if I'm sad, why should I be sad?" I'm confused did something happen?

"Because of the baby." He says. "what happened to the baby?"

"You lost the baby" he says slowly.. holy shit!

"I what?" I take a deep breath. "I think you fainted when we got to the hospital, that's why you probably don't remember anything clear." He says.

Tears are filling my eyes, "yes" I say. "What?" Shawn looks at me weird again. "Yes, I'm sad" I say holding my tears. I don't know why I'm suddenly so sad, at first I did want this baby. Before Shawn talked to me and got me to realize that I didn't, and now when it's really gone, I want it back.

"I'm sorry hunny" Shawn comes to me and he hugs me and kisses me on the forehead. "I love you B" he says.

"I love you too." I kiss him.

It's been a few more hours I went through some more tests just to make sure I'm ok, it's less painful now. The doctors said I should be fine and if I feel some sort of pain again, I should come straight back.

Oh and they said not to do any activities for the next week. Which means no sex. I feel bad for Shawn, I can survive but I'm not sure he will be able to.

"Here, you can go change" Shawn says giving me a bag filled with cloths.

I blink at him For a second, oh... I completely forgot that my cloths are filled with blood, I should throw them away.

"What is it?" I ask surprised. "I asked my mom if she can stop at your house to bring you some cloths." He says.

"Don't worry, I didn't tell her why you were here, I didn't tell anyone, I won't tell her or anyone of you don't want me to." He says.

"Thank you" I say giving him a kiss. I slowly get out of the bed and I go to the bathroom, I change into the cloths Karen brought me and Shawn took me back home. When we arrived back home, we walked in and we saw Lucas with his girlfriend on the couch.... I feel weird they are sitting on couch after what happened yesterday, I mean, 2 days ago........

"Hey.." his girlfriend comes over and says hi hugging both Shawn and I, Shawn first.

"Hi how are you?" She asks smiling hugging Shawn, they never met before. "Hey, I'm good" Shawn says awkwardly hugging her back. He knows who she is, even tho she didn't introduce herself.

"Hi Michelle how are you?" She says moving to me, giving me a hug too. "I'm good," I say. "Great" She says nicely.

"Hey B I'm going to go take a shower ok? I reek i could really use a shower" he says. "Ok" i say giving him a gentle kiss on the lips,

"Why do you call her B?" Lana, the girlfriend, asks Shawn, stopping him for walking to my room to take a shower.

"Excuse me?" Shawn says politely. "There is no B in her name, why do you call her B?" She asks.

"Oh that's a long story," he says. Wait, he remembers? I myself don't remember, it's been so long since someone called me Michelle, (except Lana right now, or the doctors, or when Shawn introduced me yesterday to the waitress.)

I'm just used to people calling me B.

"I have time" She says. Damn she is so nosy. I mean, I want to know too, but like, girl.

I look at Shawn, I know he doesn't want to talk to this girl instead of walking to the shower, I don't know what look to give him back, I'm conflicted. I want to hear the story too. But I also want him to feel comfortable.

"Fine" Shawn says looking so down that he has to sit now and talk to this girl and explain to her something so meaningless.

"Well I don't even know if Lucas or B, I mean Michelle know the true reason I call her that" Shawn says. "Dude I'm calling her B too, literally all the time" Lucas says.

Wow, Lucas spoke? For the first time since we walked in.

I slowly sit on the couch next to Shawn, "is there a secret meaning to why you call me B?" I ask. Shawn looks at me, he starts right into my eyes.

He moved his head closer to me, "there are 2 meanings, 1 I'm sure you know. The other, I'll tell you when we are alone" he whispers in my ear. Than he moves his head so I can see him smirking at me and biting his lip, and than he looks back at Lana and Lucas.

Uh, bitch what?