Waking Up In Darkness

Return

Elena's point of view

It is dark as I walk up the steps to the house, my house. It has only been days but it feels like years since I have seen it. The curtains are drawn and all the lights are off so I know he is sleeping. Now is my last chance to see him, closing my eyes I whisper his name.. "Damon.''

Slowly I open my eyes again, the lamp is still on, a shadow casting across the room. Looking down I smile, there he is in front of me, fast asleep, Alexis in her crib by the bed side. She is babbling quietly. Walking over to her, knowing she won't see me I peep into the crib. It brings a tear to my eye as I watch over my little princess, she is so small.. All I want to do is hold her.

Wiping the tears from my face I walk back over to the bed. I don't have long. Bonnie's Grams could only keep me here for a few minutes. Kneeling on the edge of the bed I place my hands on either side of Damon's head.. He looks so weak, so fragile. He hadn't been feeding I could tell. I suck in a deep breath as I simply watch his chest moving up and down with each breath. 'Get it together Elena' I tell myself as I move a little, getting more comfortable. Concentrating on him and only him I let myself go. "Damon, Damon it's me.. It's Elena.. I don't have long but I wanted to tell you. I love you baby, and..." I sigh focusing harder, praying he'll remember this when he wakes up."I need you to.. To forget, to move on, to protect our daughter.. To love her like you promised me you would. I'm happy Damon, I'm with my family again.. I know you sent Faye to look for me, but the thing is, I didn't have any unfinished business. You made me so happy, you made my life complete and I couldn't have wished for anything more.. You need to stop pushing everyone away Damon. You need to let them in, let them help you. I've been watching over you, and you know who I'm talking about when I say don't push him away.. Stefan loves you, stop telling him there is nothing he can do, he loved me too.. Once." I flinch dropping my hands as I realize what I've said. I remember how much you hated me bringing up the past and I went and did it again. 'Good one dummy.' My subconscious shouts 'Even in death your fuck things up.' There is a sudden twinge in my body, I gasp, reaching out for Damon again, I could feel myself fading.. I wasn't done, there was so much more I needed to say.

"Sheila I'm not ready!" I call out as I try to focus on Damon again. My eyes fill with tears as I try to hold on with all I can. "Please Sheila, I need more time." The tears drop from my face, landing on Damon as I lie down onto his chest. "DAMON I LOVE YOU!" I shout as I slowly feel the light taking over me. I close my eyes tightly hoping all of it is just a dream, that I will wake up in his arms the day before Alexis was born. I was slipping away faster and faster my life buzzing in my head, My mom, my dad, Jeremy, Stefan, Damon, my best friends.. I shake my head, trying to make it go away when I feel a tight pair of arms around me, holding me close.

"Elena.." My eyes snap open, only to have my face fall as the arms around me are not the ones I wanted. Falling in a fit of uncontrollable tears into the muscular arms I whisper. "Daddy, I want to go back.''