Not Again? || l.s

t w e n t y - t h r e e

twenty-three | taste like her

Thinking about her
Under your bed sheets
The way that she's whispering
The way that she's pulling you in

~ 'girl crush' by little big town

ツ

When Harry got back to the couch, Liam and Zayn gave him questioning looks. Harry shook them off and sunk onto the couch between them.

"He just wanted to know what happened between Louis and me", he sighed.

"So would we, actually," Liam said.

So would Harry.

"Yeah, well", he said it with finality, end of the conversation.

Liam and Zayn wouldn't stop looking at him after that, though. Looking at him like he's something fragile that's close to cracking into hundreds of irreparable pieces. Harry couldn't stand it.

"I've got homework," he said abruptly. "I probably shouldn't put it off any longer. I'll see you guys later."

"Are you sure you don't want to stay?" Zayn asked. "Teenwolf is on next."

Harry shook his head. He loved that show, but what he'd love more was to be alone. Even Dylan O'Brein's stupid sarcasm and Tyler Hoechlin's sexy grumpiness weren't enough to choose some company over solitude.

"I'm okay. Next time, alright?"

Because Harry had the worst luck -and roommate- the room was occupied when he got there. He pushed open the door without knocking, and he found Louis and his girlfriend on the bed, her straddling him. Harry's heart sunk into his stomach, and he's frozen, for a moment. It's not the first time this had happened, and he figured it wouldn't be the last. But Louis was meeting his eyes over her shoulder as she kissed along his jaw and neck, his lips parting in a silent moan.

It's more than just jealousy. It's this crushing, horrible pain in his chest because he never even got what she had. He never really had Louis. Sure, they fucked, but that's not the same as a relationship. That didn't mean anything. Sex didn't mean anything when you couldn't hold the person afterwards. When you couldn't kiss each other just because, without needing to progress things into something more.

As quietly as he could, Harry backed away and shut the door, feeling a burning in his eyes. He only got halfway down the hall before Louis came out of the room, calling his name. Harry turned, finding Louis shirtless and panting, standing in the middle of the hallway.

"What?" Harry demanded.

He prayed he didn't sound as upset as he felt, because that war that he and Louis started so many months ago was still going. The battle's different, but the opposing sides were the same. And Harry refused to let Louis beat him. He refused to admit defeat, to stand down.

"Do you ever knock?" Louis shouted at him. "God, you have the worst timing!"

"Sorry, but not everyone lives on your schedule, Louid!" Harry shouted back.

He wiped at his eyes as discreetly as he could, but the burning tears now felt like they're from frustration more than anything. The door next to Harry opened, and the guy from the room next to theirs peeked his head out.

"Great," he mumbled. "The guys next door are fighting again."

"At least they're not fucking again," someone else in the room, hidden by the door, replied.