Control

xxxii | family reunions

DO THEY KNOW I'M NOT ONE OF THEM ANYMORE?

In front of me were two Evolutians, their names I never learned. One had long, dark blue hair that reached her waist, the other with a baseball cap backwards on his head. The two were still trying to get inside the force field, with no luck.

"Rah, we both felt the barrier weaken, and you still can't get in?"

"I'm sorry, but it's kind of a long process. Wanna try for yourself?"

"I can try short circuiting it, if you want."

I'm positive my mother knows that I've abandoned her and the Institute. Her voice no longer filled my head with stupid nonsense, and I know she wouldn't just stay silent, especially after what I did to Aidan. She wouldn't have let me hold his hand as he slipped away from our world... would she? She definitely wouldn't like my plans right now.

I'm fairly sure she lost all connection with me. But I could always be wrong.

I'm probably wrong, if I'm being honest.

Deep breaths, Lauren, I tell myself. This should be simple, if they didn't know where my loyalties lied now. This was going to be easy. I was their superior. And if it didn't work out, I could do exactly what they're planning on doing to the barrier to them.

I walked out of my hiding place, one hand tucked in the pocket of my jean. I tried acting as natural as possible, which wasn't the easiest to do when you were supposed to be someone with a heart of stone, but really needed to let a river of tears flow. 

"You two," I call out. The two heads snap back, the look in their eyes going from annoyance to worry. The girl - Rah, short for Sarah? - stood up and brushed the dust from her grey sweatpants. "Progress report, now."

"We still can't get in, commander," the boy explains. "It, for some reason, has gotten significantly weaker in the last hour but we can't get in still. Whoever has it up is pretty strong."

"Short circuiting the barrier is what we are planning on doing next." The girl tucks her hands in her back pockets. "I think that'll probably work and we'll finally be able to get in."

"They haven't left yet?" I asked, though pretty much already knew the answer. It was a stupid choice on them for staying in one place. They counted on the barrier put up by two teenage boys, one that they knew went out and weren't sure if he was coming back. There were kids in there.

"Surprisingly, no," the boy replied. "Maybe they're waiting for someone."

I crossed my arms. "Who, possibly, could they be waiting for?"

"Dr. Henderson didn't tell you? Aidan was suspected to be in the Institute early today. He tried to be sneaky with the cameras but kind of failed, plus his sister wasn't in her bed after."

"Oh... right." Mom did tell me that, which was how I found Aidan in the first place. He left the house under their noses, and he wasn't sneaky? "So he hasn't returned back here since then, is what I'm understanding?"

"Nope, he hasn't." Gosh, the Institute needs better people on lookout. I'm sure he came back here, since his sister wasn't with him the last time I saw him. My heart won't be able to handle the look on Jordyn's face when I have to tell her.

I rolled my eyes, trying to seem more annoyed than hurt. "Pathetic." I stepped in front of them, searching for something. Tyson was holding this barrier up for now... I just need him to break it so I can break in.

Lauren, what the hell are you-

In a split second, the barrier goes down, me stepping in before I put it back up. The two Evolutians remain on the other side, look of frustration on their face. I couldn't hear their words, but was able to read their lips. "What the hell? Let us in."

Instead, I got into their minds, sending them back to the palace. I didn't need them inches away from the people I really, truly care about. I turned back around, walking towards my front door, into a place that barely felt like home. My hands shake as I search for the spare key, because there should be one around, right? 

After three minutes of frustrated searching, I put a shaky hand on the doorknob. "Screw it," I muttered, using the strength inside of me to turn the handle, breaking it off. The door creaked open, dust from inside escaping. 

I looked down at the broken doorknob in my hand. I'll fix it, eventually. For now, I put the door chain in, hoping no one else breaks in.

The house looked like it always did, just a bit dusty. They were all probably camping out in the basement I've never been in. The pictures of younger versions of my and Spencer still cover the walls, making my heart ache again. Our smiles were so bright, and don't think I remember what Spencer's looked like anymore. 

There's a loud crash, footsteps following. A door I never seemed to notice burst open, my brother stumbling out. He's breathing heavily, his eyes fixed on me. Spencer fumbled with the gun at his side, holding it up, pointing it at me.

Out of instinct, I reached for mine, pointing it back at him. My heart is beating out of my chest in fear. 

The others stumble out behind him, frantic. They all look at me like I'm not from this world, someone they've never seen before. Shock, that's probably what it is. It's probably why my loving brother has a gun pointed at me. 

It's Kassandra that speaks first. "Spencer, put the gun down." He doesn't move an inch. "Spencer.... put the gun down."

"What did you do to him... what the hell did you do to him?" 

I gulped, trying to swallow back tears. 

"Spencer, put the gun down."

"She--"

"SHE'S YOUR LITTLE SISTER!" Kassandra screamed, defending me. 

Dad cuts in, walking towards me, stopping right beside me. "Lauren, why don't you go first? Put the gun down, kiddo."

I drop my outstretched arm, handing the weapon over to my father. He put it aside and used both hands to hold me gently. I don't look at him, but continue looking at Spencer. He lowers his gun too, but the look of anger on his face remains.  

"Lauren... do you want to tell us what happened? Why you're here?" Dad's voice his gentle. He doesn't look away from me even if I didn't make eye contact. 

But I did manage to make eye contact with Jordyn and her father, and I wanted to melt away and hide my face forever. A wave of everything that happened before now crashed onto me, making me realise why I was here, and why I was here alone. 

Please don't blame this on yourself. 

I struggled to breath, the tears I tried to hide now covered my face. I couldn't do this, I couldn't tell them why he wasn't here, because clearly they wanted to know what happened.

"Where's Aidan?" Jordyn's small, innocent voice filed my ears. I couldn't do this. Aidan said not to blame myself but I have to. I know I have to. I begin to sob, falling to my knees. 

"I tried to help him, I really did." Each breath ached, my heart ached, every part of me ached. "I don't know why he didn't--"

Kassandra rushed up to me, holding me in a tight hug. I saw the scowl on Spencer's face as she did so, something definitely bothering him. "Just breath, Lauren. It's gonna be okay."

"NO, IT'S NOT," I shrieked. My lips quivered. "It's my fault... he's gone, he's gone, and it's all my fault."

And like I expected, watching Jordyn crumble onto the floor, bursting in tears, broke my heart. Over and over again.