admiration [l.t]

iii

The drive to the upper side of campus doesn't take too long and Louis soon finds himself knocking on her door, bouncing up and down on his feet trying to keep his body warm. He's not sure why he's nervous, they have been talking every day for the past month. But maybe it's the knowledge that this isn't going to be a small conversation; they're actually going to spend hours together without others around them, their main focus being to get to know each other.

His eyes light up when he hears feet running towards the door, knowing he's soon going to be greeted by her flustered face. He hears a lock followed by the creaking of the door's hinges, and Louis was right as he saw blood rush to her cheeks. He knew it was from the cold, but he liked to believe otherwise.

"Oh, gosh, Louis! Come in, come in!" She gently shoves Louis into her dorm and slams the door behind them, shielding them from the crisp, chilling air. "Sorry about that, the air conditioning in our hallway is broken."

"It's alright. Of course being me I picked the only day to go out that feels like Santa farted on us, huh." He says through small laugh that didn't quite match his mood.

Why did he pick today? Why? Why? Why?

He looks down at her hoping she was still excited to go out. What he didn't expect to see were those innocent brown eyes almost closed due to her laughing state.

"Oh, so now Santa has cold farts?" She laughs as she walks past him to go pour a cup of hot chocolate for the two of them.

Louis holds up his hands in defense smiling. "Maybe you would know that if you read. It's only mentioned in every Christmas story out there."

She laughs, genuinely laughs, and hands Louis a mug containing hot chocolate with mini marshmallows. He gladly takes the mug, holding it between his hands to keep them warm. "Okay now I know you're lying."

"How would you know? It is in the classic 'The Night Before Christmas.'"

Bella squints her eyes in suspicion, holding the mug close to her face trying to hide her shy smile. "Oh c'mon, I may not be a reader but I know that's not true."

Louis laughs, leaning forward slightly and shrugging in defeat. "Okay, you got me." He says placing his mug on the counter. "But how about we go? If you're still feeling up to it, because I mean if it's too cold and you don't like the cold I-"

"Actually, I was thinking we could stay here?" She cuts him off, sounding more like a question than a statement, and sets her mug on the counter as the walks over to the "living room". She rests herself on her knees in front of the counter the T.V. was on and opens a drawer, pulling out a stack of movies. "As you can see I'm not dressed to go out." Actually he hadn't noticed until now. "And I was just thinking we could chill and watch movies. I have a lot actually..." Her voice begins to trail off, Louis not being able to hear anything she was saying. Her shyness only makes him smile.

"I'd actually love that." He says walking over to where she's still browsing through her movies and begins to look as well. "But only if you have popcorn."

"Oh please, I'm a college student who spends her weekends on Netflix. Of course I have popcorn." He laughs once again for what seems like the hundredth time in just these few minutes he's been with her. "So what kind of movies do you like?"

"I don't really have a favorite. I'll watch almost anything."

"Hmm."

The boy looks over at Bella, studying her facial expressions as she looks at all the movies laid out in front of them like she hasn't seen every single one before. Her eyebrows are knitted together in concentration with her lips barely parted.

Louis lied. He does in fact have a specific genre of movies he likes to watch. The only reason he said he doesn't was because he knows he won't be watching the movie-instead he'll be watching her. He wants to see how she reacts to certain scenes in movies; if she'll cry or laugh when someone important dies. If she'll yell at the idiot who just stands in front of the killer doing absolutely nothing or actually gets scared by it. He wants to know more about her.

"How about this one. It's a classic." She states out of nowhere, holding up 'The Shining,' which happens to be one of Louis' least favorites.

"I actually love that movie." No he doesn't.

She grins, proud of her choice, and sets the disc into the player. Louis gets up off the floor to go make some popcorn, which ends up taking him much longer than expected because he couldn't find the snack in her small pantry, which was behind the hot chocolate, and the microwave almost exploded. But she doesn't need to know that part.

When he returns to the living room Bella is seated on the far end of the couch with a blanket wrapped around her as she types something on her phone. Louis sighs as he rests on the opposite end of her, setting the popcorn between them. He strips himself of the red hoodie, leaving him in a white long sleeve shirt, and takes off his vans.

Bella stares at his chest and arms through her eyelashes, the white shirt making his tattoos very noticeable. Before Louis can notice, however, she looks back down to her phone, finishing the message she had been typing.

For the first hour of the movie the two watch in silence. No comment was made on any specific scene and the popcorn has barely been touched. Louis can feel the tension in the room, it nagging at him like an itch he couldn't reach.

He wanted to spark up a conversation, but he wasn't sure if she was actually enjoying the movie unlike him. He wanted so desperately to scoot closer to her, to feel the warmth of her body, but he didn't want to make her uncomfortable. He wanted popcorn, but she had grabbed the bowl for herself.

So he just sits there, blankly staring at the screen ahead of them. He wishes he was out in the cold where his heart would feel warm instead of here inside, where his body feels warm but his heart feels cold.