SCARED ➼ krii7y

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴛʜɪʀᴛᴇᴇɴ

13 | THINGS FALL APART FASTER THAN I CAN FIX THEM

jaren stands at the front door of john's house, lacking the energy to knock. graduation is in two weeks, and jaren just needs a break.

ever since his mom died a month ago, he has felt the pressure building up on him. he's becoming like a ticking time bomb and it's terrifying for him. he doesn't know when he's going to break or explode at this point.

"jaren? john told me you weren't going to be here until seven and we're still getting everything ready for you," john's mom says, peeking her head out the door.

"it's fine, i can make my bed later," jaren sighs, going inside of the house with his blue luggage trailing behind him.

john comes running down the stairs with a huge smile on his face and jaren can even see a small kid in the background.

"hey flower boy. this is my little brother, chase," john says, pulling the little four year old in front of him. jaren walks up, going down on one knee and looking the boy in the eyes.

"hi, i'm jaren," he says, smiling at the small kid in the pajamas, "is that thomas the train on your shirt?"

"heck yea," the small boy giggles, playing with jaren's fingers. john smiles, seeing how happy his boyfriend and brother are together. jaren seems like he would make a good parent.

john's mother looks up, sending a look to her son. she's never seen the boy stare at someone with such loving eyes.

jaren has changed john, yet she can't tell if it's a good or bad thing now.

🍪

jaren sits on john's bed, waiting for the boy and his mother to get back from the store. he's only on his fifth game of counter strike when his phone starts ringing.

at first he ignores it, too focused on the game to even bother looking at the caller id. his phone stops ringing and jaren sighs. he smiles until his phone begins to ring again.

he looks down, groaning as evan's name appears on the screen. he slowly raises the phone to his ear, taking a deep breath.

"what do you want, evan?" jaren says with a bored tone, making the other line go quiet. jaren hears soft mumbling in the background and clears his throat, "evan, you okay?"

"yep, why wouldn't i be?" the other boy chokes out with a strained voice, causing jaren to pause his game and pay full attention to evan on the line.

"evan, there's definitely something wrong with you right now. you don't need to lie to me," jaren states, looking at john's pristine white wall, "did jonathan hurt you?"

"no, no. jon would never hurt me, i promise you that," evan mumbles out, barely being picked up by the line.

"then what's going on?" jaren says firmly, leaning against the bed frame, "it has to be something important. you wouldn't have sounded so broken over it if it wasn't."

"jaren, i really need to tell you something," evan steadies himself, taking deep breaths as jon kisses his cheek for comfort.

"what is it?" jaren sighs, looking out the window as he sees a car pulling into the driveway.

"i need to tell you about the bet."

🍪

by the time that john finally gets back in the house, jaren knows about everything. he knows about the stupid bet and what john agreed to on that day.

yet he doesn't know why he isn't really mad about it. what did jaren really expect when he was getting in a relationship with a former player?

john runs up the stairs, looking at his boyfriend playing with the zipper of his jacket, "hi beautiful, what are you doing?"

jaren looks up, smiling at john with emotions bouncing in his heart, "hey, i'm just sitting here and enjoying the stars."

"you really do have an obsession with the stars, don't you? i should change your nickname to star boy instead," john laughs, walking over to jaren and planting many kisses on his boyfriend's lips.

"john?" jaren asks through his john's kisses. john ignores the boy, continuing to kiss him and playing with little locks that hang in weird ways on jaren's head. jaren pushes his boyfriend away, grabbing his shirt collar.

"yes flower boy?" john whispers, wanting to kiss the other boy again. he can hear the noises of his mother moving pots and pans throughout the kitchen and silence encases the bedroom.

"evan told me," jaren states, tears forming in his eyes.

"evan told you what?" john tilts his head, cracking his neck and looking at jaren with worried eyes. he can't even remember the last thing evan and him talked about.

"he told me about the bet, john," jaren wipes his eyes, causing john to pull away from his boyfriend.

"jaren, i am so sorry. i agreed to the bet a while ago and it's never affected my feelings for you. no matter what i said or agreed to, i still love you," john rambles, trying to save himself from the inevitable breakup.

everyone else is right. john is just a heartbreaker and he can't be trusted at this point. what was jaren thinking when he decided to date someone like john?

"good, that's all i needed to hear," jaren says, grabbing onto the boy's shoulders and making him stop.

"jaren, are you crazy? we started dating because of a bet and you're completely fine with it?" john questions, looking at the boy with a confused look.

"john, i really don't care how we got together. all i care about is that we are together now and that we both love each other. as long as i have that, i'm going to be happy," jaren says, laying down on john's bed.

the room goes silent as john lays down and wraps his arms around jaren's waist. a minute later, jaren makes a noise and turns to face john.

"why did you even accept the bet in the first place?" jaren asks, looking john straight in the eyes.

"flower boy, it's getting late. let's just go to bed," john says, avoiding the question and watching jaren turn back around. john didn't need jaren knowing why he did what he did.

jaren was always craving the truth and john was always too scared to give it to him.

and, truth be told, that was their downfall in the end.

🍪

song: colder by nina nesbitt