march 4, 2019
it's days like today.
days with nothing to do but care for myself.
4 am nights with new friends.
nights with all the windows down in the car, my numb hands dancing to Taylor Swift.
it's mornings with my Bible open on my lap with the sunshine pouring through.
it's days when I don't even sit down because I'm so busy.
times when I'm alone, listening to the music I like, doing all the things you hated.
it's catching your friends still looking at my social media.
it's mornings when the first thing on my mind isn't you.
it's rainy afternoons, making lunch for myself, reading the books you said were stupid.
it's wearing my hair in braids.
it's cutting my hair.
days when school is the only thing i can think about.
nights calling my best friends, laughing until I can't even inhale or exhale.
it's random texts reminding me of my worth.
it's listening to other's problems, and helping them.
it's days when the only outlet I use to express myself is paint.
lazy afternoons with mom in town, laughing over froyo.
it's days when I see you looking happy.
these are the days.
the ones where my hands are numb from the windows down
with the music blaring so I can't even hear my own thoughts
my hair is a tangle
the days when it's easier to breathe. to see.
to feel again.
