Trapped

Chapter 19

It's 7 pm. I kneel on the kitchen floor scrubbing the spotless tiles, thinking about Layla and my wonderful brothers. Layla hasn't been here with me for almost two months now and all I can think is that they killed her. Something in the pit of my stomach tells me I'm right, but I can't be. Because if I am, that means that I've lost my only friend and worse...that I'm just as disposable.

Occasionally, Jeremy floats to the surface of my mind. Lately, I've been looking forward to seeing him at the end of the day. Seeing his smiling face walk through the door, locking eyes with mine almost immediately. It's almost a relief. Almost.

No matter how much I want to tell myself he is a good person, I can't. He has hurt me, raped me and I can't bear the thought that I might be falling for him.

Pushing that thought away, I scrub the floors harder, getting the last tiny specks of dirt and grime off the kitchen tiles. When I get done, I throw the rag in the sink after washing it off with soap and water. Then I put the bucket, broom, and mop back in the supply closet underneath the stairs.

Before I can make my way upstairs to change and put myself to bed, Josh, Lukas, and Markus walk through the door. After a few seconds, Jeremy follows suit. He looks stressed and a tad angry. Not good. Very much not good. When we lock eyes, his expression softens an iota, but not enough to ease the churning in my stomach.

"Lilian, my room. Now." I immediately start speed walking up the steps, making my way to his bedroom, not daring to defy Jeremy's direct order. Going against him right now would mean extreme punishment that I don't think I would be able to handle.

A few minutes after I have settled myself on the foot of his bed, Jeremy walks in, slamming the door behind him. He paces the floor several times, making me more anxious with each, almost excruciatingly loud, footfall. About two minutes later moves to stand in front of me.

I can feel his eyes on the top of my head, but looking up would be considered a challenge of his authority and would result in severe punishment, so I keep my head bowed as he towers over me.

Soon he gently places his forefinger under my chin and raises my eyes to meet his. "Don't be scared, my Lily." He whispers to me softly. I nod my head, showing my understanding, but can still feel the fear behind my eyes and I know he can still see it as well.

He sighs before sitting next to me on the edge of the bed. He pulls me close, pressing our sides together and I take that as my opportunity to lean my head on his shoulder. He hugs me to him and kisses the top of my head.

"I'm not upset with you. You have no reason to be afraid of me, Lilian." I sigh and lean deeper into his touch. A part of me is telling me not to believe his words. That they are lies and he is dangerous. But the bigger part of me, knows that isn't true. Jeremy is kind and sweet and loving. For the past few weeks he has comforted me, held me, made sure that I ate enough food. He has been anything but a monster. Weeks ago, maybe a month, maybe two, I told myself that because he took me from my old life, that he was evil and would only cause me harm. But that's not true. I understand that now.

"Jeremy?" I hesitantly ask into his shoulder.

"Yes, sweetheart?" My lips tilt into a small smile at the nickname.

"Thank you." I respond without any hesitation or waver in my voice.

"Of course, Lily," he says lovingly, tilting my head upward so I could look into his beautiful green eyes.

"Beautiful," He said to himself before placing his lips on mine in a passionate kiss.

***

The smell of alcohol hits me like a sack of bricks as soon as I walk into the local bar. Crowds of people are packed into every inch of the large room, every single one with a twinge of hard liquor on their breath.

I hold my breath as I make my way to the bar. Without having to search, I see Luke Williams perched on a bar stool, beer in hand. He looks like complete crap with his hair disheveled and the large bags under his eyes. He's hunched over, worried and defeated.

He's been avoiding the investigation as well as the investigative teams on his sister's case for the past month. After I kicked him off the case, explaining to him that he was too personally involved, he has taken to drinking his sorrow and loneliness away.

I finally make my way through the mass of people to the stool next to him where I sit and clear my throat, loudly. When he doesn't respond, I clear my throat again, this time closer to his ear. I get ready to do it once again when he says, "Ramirez," still looking forward at the hundreds of liquor bottles behind the counter.

"What are you doing to yourself?" I ask him, concern and anger apparent in my words and on my face if he would ever look at me. He doesn't reply and I sigh, flagging the bar tender over telling him to grab me a beer. We don't speak for several minutes. I'm going to wait for him to initiate this conversation.

"It was nice seein' ya, Detective." Luke says as he stands up, throwing down a couple fives.

I stand up, quickly grabbing his arm before he can get too far and pull him back. "Luke. This is not you—," I start, but don't get the chance to finish.

"What the fuck do you know about me?" He says, angrily, not yelling, but not talking in his earlier calm tone either. "I lost the most important thing in my life! You have no right to tell me how I should act right now!" His tone slowly escalates until he's screaming in my face.

He yanks his arm from my grip, staring at me, not making a move to leave. "What would Lilian want?" Before I can get the last word out, Luke has me by the collar of my shirt.

"Don't you fucking say her name!" He screams so a few of the people around us turn around to watch. He pushes me away from him when people start to gather in a circle around us. "She's gone." He lowers his voice a fraction, but not enough to make much of a difference and pushes me back roughly.

As he pushes his way through the crowd, I yell to him, "We will bring her back, Luke."

And that's exactly what I planned to do.