trigger warning: bugs
FADE IN:
INT. A WHITE WALL — ???
i do not remember my childhood.
[here we see: maggots eating a 7up cake. they have fallen in love with the sweet delicacy. it appears they have found heaven right here].
i do not remember going to the park on a summer afternoon. i do not remember the sour strawberry candies and grape soda paradisiacal wonders that most kids had tasted. i do not remember the sun ever touching my skin in a way that didn't burn off my flesh.
[cut to: a baby pink sippy cup, drenched in mud from the rain. there is a cigarette placed right next to it].
i do not remember falling asleep on the couch with the t.v. screen lighting up my face in the dark. then waking up in the morning in my own bed, with no recollection of how i got there. i do not remember asking my parents how i got there, and having them tell me it was the fairy who carried me to dreamland.
[we see: an off-yellow wall with drawings scribbled on by a child with crayons. they have faded from age. the drawings are indescribable, inexplicable. it may have been a person, but it did not look like a person anymore. with each guess, another question arises. what child would draw something like this?]
i do not remember anyone telling me stories of the moon or the planets. i do not remember the love of space and time, of which i am filled with wonder in this forgotten childhood. but all that i can feel for both time and space is i cannot seem to run away no matter how hard i try. no matter how hard i try, the contents of what lies in the vastness of space spills into my brain and i can't see what lies ahead of me. time chokes me by their hand i can't think. i can't think. it hurts too much. i can't stop thinking about it. i can't fucking think. i can't think with the knowledge that time is always running out. i am paranoid of that ghostly hourglass that hangs at the end of that dark hallway, growing farther every time i run towards it to reset what i had started. i can't fucking think.
[we see: a playground. lonely and dirty. ugly and stained].
these memories are not mine. i have never had a childhood like this. i did not have a father, my mother did not carry me to dreamland. i have never in my life, experienced the glow of the sun or the glow of a television screen. i did not have a childhood. these memories are not mine. they don't belong to me.
[a forgotten childhood lies in incomplete dreams. the quietness of your childhood room will haunt you when you are cold and alone].
FADE OUT:
NOTES thank u 4 1k i honestly thought this wld be the book tht no one wld read but this has 1k now!!!!!! What The Fucking Shit!!!!!!!!!! i lov u all very much.. i don't know wht else to say.. not a lot of people read author's notes so this is pretty much useless .____. anyway thanks again <33
