Spitting Bullets

Chapter 14

In the blink of an eye Nicole's entire life changed. One minute her family was thriving and then it fell apart once again. Erin was gone. Gabby was gone. Antonio was gone. It all seemed like a bad dream she couldn't wake up from. But here she was, a single mother of two, left all alone by the man she once loved.

***

It all started when Gabby moved to Puerto Rico, divorcing Matt in the process. After that Eva was hurt and Antonio couldn't stop blaming himself... so he relapsed. Nicole knew something was wrong, but she couldn't find the pills. So she figured she must be imagining it. But one day she found out her hunch was right.

Nicole walked into the apartment, carrying her 9 month old daughter in her arms. Isabella was the cutest thing and was growing up so fast. As Nicole walked in, she froze. Picture frames were smashed, and there were beer bottles laying around. As she walked further into her home she noticed two fist sized holes in the bedroom door. Tears filled her eyes as she took in the sight before her. Immediately she checked the drawers...all his stuff was gone. On the bed laid a note with two little words scribbled on it in his handwriting.

I'm sorry.

The first person she called was Hank, and then Jay. She couldn't believe this was happening. Nicole decided she couldn't stand being there any longer so she took Isabella and headed black to the district.

When she walked in all puffy eyed, Hank pulled her directly into his office. Jay took Isabella, so Nicole could have a moment.

"Hank..." she trailed, not knowing what to say.

"I know," he stated grimly, "He's at a rehab center right now. I took him there myself. And then he's moving down to Puerto Rico to be with Gabby and his family."

"But he has a family here!" yelled Nicole as she stood up with tears of anger rolling down her flushed cheeks, "He has two grown children and a daughter who's not even one year old. So he's just going to abandon us? Because that's not the kind of man Antonio Dawson is."

"I don't think the Antonio Dawson we know exists anymore. I think this job broke him down and the only way for him to stay clean is to leave. I'm not saying it's okay, but I get it."

"Why didn't I see this coming?"

"You couldn't have. None of us did. If you need a few days off work I understand. I-"

"No, work is a good distraction," she stated, no longer crying as she stood up, "Besides, I'm a single parent of two kids now. I have to be strong for them because I'm all they have."

Nicole walked out of his office and over to Jay. He wrapped her in a hug, sort of understanding what she was going through just minus the kids.

"What am I going to do Jay? I can't go back to that place. I just can't. Bad memories aside, there's holes in walls and shattered glass. I can't take the kids there."

"I'd offer you to stay at my place, but it's a one bedroom," he explained.

"I know. And I wouldn't want to intrude on you like that," Nicole sighed, "I'm going over to the firehouse to let Kelly know what's happening. I'll see you tomorrow morning."

"Okay. Take care."

A few minutes later Nicole arrived at 51. As soon as she say Kelly, she began spilling everything to him. She didn't notice that Matt had walked in behind her as she was finishing up.

"I'm trying to figure out where I'm going to stay. I might just rent a hotel room tonight, so if you could keep Noah that would be great. I just can't go back to that place."

"Why don't you guys come stay with me?" suggested Matt, catching Nicole's attention.

"What?"

"Yeah. Gabby's gone now. So I have the place to myself. I have two extra bedrooms, it's really no trouble. I'm not home all that much anyway."

"If you don't mind, that would be great."

"Of course. After shift I can help you get your main stuff over," Matt stated.

"And tomorrow we can get the rest of yours and the kids stuff moved in," suggested Kelly.

"Thank you so much Matt. That's just one less thing I have to worry about," she smiled, hugging Matt.

"Anything for you and the kids."

***

Nicole went back to her place and packed a duffel bag for her and Bella. She grabbed the small bassinet that she used to sleep in when they shared a room, a blanket, the necessities, and clothes for the two of them. Matt had given her his key to the place, so she could go get settled before he got home.

When she entered the large apartment, she could tell it was a guys place. Matt had plastered and painted the walls a dark gray. The pictures of him and Gabby were gone...replaced by pictures of him and his friends. As she walked around the place, she saw a framed picture of her, Matt, Kelly, and the kids from Halloween. It was adorable.

Nicole got her bedroom all set up with her and Bella's stuff before moving to the kitchen. Matt didn't have much, but she could work with it. Bella named in the pack-n-play in the bedroom while Nicole cooked dinner. She thought it'd be a nice surprise for Matt and a way to thank him. As she was finishing up the pasta, Matt walked in the door. He loved the smell of the place.

"Nicole?" he questioned, making sure she was there and it wasn't some crazy person.

"I'm in the kitchen," called Nicole as Matt finally spotted her across the room.

The open concept of the place was pretty great. He set his bag down on the chair near the front door and headed straight for the kitchen.

"What smells so good?"

"I made spaghetti and meatballs with a side of vegetables for dinner."

"You didn't have to do that."

"Yeah well, it's my way of saying thanks. You have no idea how much I appreciate this."

"Like I said, anything for you in the kids. You deserve it," he grinned, grabbing a beer from the fridge, "Besides I know what it's like to have your heart broken by a Dawson. It sucks."

"You're telling me," chuckled Nicole, "At least Gabby didn't leave you and your daughter."

"Yeah, I guess that's true. Speaking of, where is the little munchkin?"

"Napping, but she should be awake soon."

Nicole plated food before handing a plate over to Matt. He took it with a smile as Nicole sat down beside him, the baby monitor sitting next to her.

"My god Nicole. This is amazing," complimented Matt.

"Thanks. Once I had Noah, I took a few cooking classes, so I could provide him with some home cooked meals. But it ended up benefiting everyone."

"Oh yeah. I think this is the first time in years that I've come home to dinner being served. I mean I was more of the cook than her, but by the end of the day I was tired and just ordered take out. Or my schedule was so messed up."

"That's the perks of having kids around. There's a routine."

"Well I could get used to living like this."

"Yeah. Me too."

The very very very over due update is here!! With Antonio's departure from PD, I wasn't sure how to continue this book. I would definitely love your guys' input, so comment or message me on what you guys like or want to see.

Thanks for being patient!

Xoxo