I'm Here Now But You're All Going To Regret It

Hurt Me Again, Please

I saw the red behind your blue eyes
And I was scared
Of what would happen if I stayed
So I left

And I tried to forget
The way you called out my name
Sort of in a rush
But pronouncing every hidden syllable
Grabbing my hand
And pulling me along through crowds of people
Because you knew it would take me
Hours when you could do it in
Seconds
Laughing at my jokes
Grimacing at my jokes
You hearing them from afar
And me knowing the reason
you were laughing like an idiot was
Because of me

I didn't touch the parts that
Hurt to put pressure on
Like the dark purple yellow bruises
That you might have had
Something to do with
Or the cold nights sleeping
In another room
Without someone next to me
Because
-we-
Decided we needed space

So I hold your hand and my breath
Terrified of what you might want
As you put me back in my place