Villains ➵ bill skarsgård a.u.

thirty one

Right after we finished our food, we trotted out of the cafeteria like there was a zombie apocalypse. After all, we have stayed there long enough, and the chances of any of Ella and Ericka’s friends seeing us was bigger than all their egos combined. Romina and Arthur disappeared for a minute to tell his professors he was going home due to influenza, hopefully they'll believe him enough to let him go. We waited for them by Dalton’s car, impatience growing in the air the longer they took. The snow has stopped for now, the five inches of thick powder in the school parking lot, a struggle to move on. The sun was no where to be seen, large grey clouds concealing whatever was left of the light. Despite the three layers of clothing I had, my teeth chattered from the cold, goosebumps forming on any part of my skin that was exposed.

Once Arthur and Romina returned we promptly got into the car, doing our best to fit without vigorously squeezing each other to death. It turned out, Dalton’s suggestion of improvisation back in the cafeteria wasn't such a good idea. Dustin, Brylle, and Dalton sat comfortably on the front seats, Jumper forced to sit on Brylle’s lap for the sake of practicality while the rest of us sat like canned sardines at the back; Me, Georgie, Romina and Arthur, our pants rubbing together by accident. I kept myself next to the windshield to avoid claustrophobia, rolling the windows down as I put a cigarette stick between my lips. The mood was relatively lighter in the car than the cafeteria to my surprise, chuckles rising back to fill the void of sounds every now and then as jokes were thrown around that Jumper and Brylle were going to end up fucking at the end of the day.

I found myself laughing as I look out the dead trees hurtling away from us as Dalton drove. We were all laughing, even Georgie, the sound of their cackles the usual music to my ears. Nonetheless, I still feel the weight of Arthur's presence. He was this anomaly in our normal interactions of vile disgusting words and disturbing use of humour, and no matter how much he hides it by acting all confident and productive, I’m aware he could feel it too. I know because I've been there. I've been in his situation of desperately trying to fit in. With the pack for that matter, which wasn't very difficult to achieve since they were all exceptionally welcoming when I first joined, and once we told each other our issues it was an automatic click; but he was different. He hasn't experienced the agony of having to silence your thoughts with something physical, and it shows. Or perhaps he was just good at pretending.

I took a long drag on my cigarette, sucking in as much smoke as possible before blowing it out the window. I still didn't know what to do for the inevitable. I couldn't say I was scared because I wasn't. I wasn't scared of the idea of Ella or Ericka making up some filthy rumour again about any of us taking advantage of Arthur. No, I was terrified. People have seen us with him, people will talk, and people will make up something for the sake of entertainment, and I didn't know if I was ready for that yet. It has been a while since I heard my name get soiled in the lockers and I was beginning to get used to it. It was a nice feeling not to get called names for once while walking to class, but the fact that eventually that might have to end terrifies the shit out of me. I didn't need that now. We didn't need that now. We were all emotionally and physically drained of energy to work just by having to deal with Sarah's disappearance, and I'm afraid it would overflow if other people get involved.

At the end of the day, this is all my fault. And like everything else, I would have to face the consequences. I just wish it doesn't come to the point where the pack has to endure something horrible they don't deserve.

The ride to Ad Urbem took us more than an hour to achieve, Dalton's car repeatedly getting stuck in deep snow and having to get pushed. The stress is lifted whenever the boys would crack jokes, Jumper and Brylle audibly flirting with each other while threatening to make us watch them hump each other in the front seat, grunts of disapproval from Romina and Georgie taking over the car while Dustin stupidly encouraged them. Jumper wasn't really one to get romantically involved with anyone in our group. Hell, none of us were, although neither have we properly established relationship rules, we just kind of do whatever feels right and appropriate. Because of that, there have been a few events when lips have touched. Right for example, that one time when Georgie accidentally french kissed Dustin because they were both drunk. The furthest anyone has gone is touching, but other than that, everything else have been only a joke.