Take Me To Church (A John Lennon Story)

Chapter One: Who Is He?

When I was young I knew that my father was different than anyone else's.  He told me that when all of the kids went out to play, it was time for me to come inside and read my Bible.  When Ella, our next door neighbor, came over, he told her that I was busy and couldn't play, even if I was just relaxing in my room.  One day I gathered enough courage to ask him why I could never play with Ella.  None of the other kids wanted to play with her, and she always seemed lonely.  

"You're not allowed," he said immediately.  

"But why not?"

Father stood up, and I looked down at the ground.  I knew I had questioned him too far.  "Look at me," he said.  "Her family is full of sin.  You will not be associated with sinners.  Do you understand me?"  

"Yes, Father."

"Good.  Now go get ready for bed." 

At the age of thirteen, I found out that Ella's brother was gay, and that Ella's father had once been arrested for allegedly assaulting a young woman.  But Mr. Hayes always seemed nice, and so did her brother.  What was wrong with them?  

However, I never really associated with Ella until one day at school.  We were assigned a partner for a project in my science class, and Ella was mine.  While we were writing down notes, she whispered, "That Lennon boy over there is staring at you."  

"The answer for number six is carbon dioxide." 

Ella nudged my arm.  "Ariel...just look up and to the right slightly."  

Even though my mind was beating against it, I did.  My father told me I shouldn't even do the tiniest of actions like that.  He said it showed that you knew he was there, and you were interested.  I wasn't allowed to be interested.  According to my father, it was his responsibility to find someone who was worthy enough for me.  

But that person needed to be worthy of him also.  

The boy had light brown hair, but it was curly and gelled.  She couldn't tell what color eyes she had, for she immediately looked away when he met her gaze.  He had pale skin and was wearing leather from head to toe.  He turned to chat to a few of his friends, and my heart began to race.  

Whoever that boy was, he was the type that my father warned me against.  Lawless, dirty and bound for Hell.  

It was my last class of the day, and I hurried to my locker.  I wasn't the type to hang around after school for clubs or to visit with friends.  My curfew was five.  The only way it would be extended is if I was helping out at church or getting groceries.  

As I hurried down the hall, I felt like I had one hundred eyes on me.  Like after that one boy watched me, everyone had to.  My heart was pounding, and I was breathing like I had just ran two miles without stopping.  I tried my best to push the crowd.  Everyone seemed to know where they were going, meanwhile I felt lost.  I ran around the corner and-

We both were on the floor.  A few people around us laughed.  He stood up immediately.  "Watch where you're going..." he began, but then he offered me a hand.  "I'm sorry."  It was the boy from science.  "I'm John.  John Lennon."  

I declined his hand, and scrambled to pick up my things on the floor before they were stepped on or kicked.  He bent down next to me.  "Let me help you-"

"No!" I recoiled from him.  Even though it felt like I had just shouted, people didn't seem to notice.  "Please...I-I've got it."  Stuffing my folders in my bag, I stood up and brushed off my skirt.  

"I'm so sorry..." John said.  "I never got your name."  But I was already hurrying away from him.  Even though to most girls that would have been an opportunity to be asked on a date, it was terrifying for me.  I wasn't sure who I was more afraid of: John or my father.  

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Ella caught up to me as I left the school grounds.  It was the most I had talked to her in one day, but she was doing most of the talking.  "I saw you and John back there.  What happened?"

"He...he ran into me."

She giggled.  "I'd love to run into him.  He's so handsome.  I've seen him and his band perform.  He's every girl's dream.  But it looks like he's got his sights set on you."  I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, wide-eyed.  "What?"  

"Ariel, you've got to admit he's good-looking.  Charlotte Wiles told me that her and her friends were driving past his aunt's house the other day and he was out in the front, painting the house, shirtless!" Ella squealed with delight.  "She says he's so muscular.  If he asks you out on a date, you'll have to tell me what they feel like."  

My heart began to pound again.  For a moment, I actually imagined what would have happened if I had stuck around instead of running away.  Would we have had a sincere conversation?  Would he have asked to see me again?  

Then I saw myself in that hallway again, and John was there, smiling and running a hand through his curly brown hair.  He kissed my hand, but then pushed me back towards the lockers.  He put my hands on his chest and looked down at me with those dark eyes.  

They were brown.  

He got closer, and closer...

But then it stopped.  I couldn't imagine being kissed.  I had never been kissed.  

I wasn't allowed to.  

"I...I've got to go." I said, hurrying down the street.  Ella called after me twice, but the pounding in my head was so awful that I couldn't hear a thing.  Father wasn't home yet, and I ran straight to my room.  I wasn't allowed to lock my door, but I shut the windows and closed the shades, leaving me in the dark.