Our Lost Minds [Taekook] ✓

[Part 12]

Yes, like I said, I was already used to that lifestyle. I lived like that, not really caring about how fucked up everything was, going with the flow.

But that doesn't mean that I didn't want to be able to go out, to get a breath of fresh air, maybe even talk to someone, who wasn't Jungkook. I did. Very much.

So when Jungkook started leaving the cell door unlocked, I immediately noticed it. He wouldn't lock them when he would go to the bathroom, to the kitchen and when he stayed inside with me.

One of the days after the dinner, I decided to go into the kitchen after him. I slowly and quietly got up the stairs, thinking how Jungkook would smile at me when he washes dishes and hands me a plate to dry it with a towel. I opened the door and went straight to the kitchen, where I saw Jungkook doing what I thought he would - doing dishes. He hummed some song under his nose with his back on me, so I tiptoed to him and surprised him with a back-hug.

Surprised him so much, the plate fell down from his hand to the ground, making a trenchant sound, ultimately surprising us both.

"Taehyung!" He yelled at me, so I flinched, broke my hold and took a few steps back, until the table behind me stopped me. "What are you doing here?! I though you love me, I thought I can trust you!"

I was left speechless. It surprised me how Jungkook could make me feel guilty in a matter of seconds, when I was the real victim here. I just wanted to help. That, and maybe change my surroundings, but that's besides the point, because I got a massive backlash for it.

"I j-just wanted to h-help," I stuttered, grasping the edge of the table with my hands. I was scared and afraid. It didn't look like Jungkook was ready to punch me or anything, at least I hoped so, but he sure looked angry.

"The only way you can help me is by staying confined in the basement, do you understand?!" The volume of his voice tone didn't change a bit during the first part, but then he breathed in and lowered it considerably. "Taehyung, please, if you really love me, go back down and wait for me, okay?"

It was the level one blackmail, usually used on kids and I almost fell for that as my lower lip whimpered.

Not completely though.

"I do love you," I said and the painful knot formed in my throat. "But if you really loved me, you wouldn't keep me there. You wouldn't use my love as a trick to contain me."

"It's for your own good!"

"It's for your own good!" I screamed the same words back at him, stressing the 'your' in the sentence. "Do you even know how it sounds? No one keeps people in the basement for their own good! Why can't we go out for a dinner outside once in a while? Why can't I come up here and help you clean up? Why!?"

"People will hurt you!"

"Well, you are hurting me too, what are you gonna do about it?!"

Jungkook's face fell and looked completely lost. It was like these words I said hit him in a right place.

Anyway, he didn't say anything. Just stood there, analyzing the look in my eyes and stayed quiet.

"Oh, fuck you," I hissed through my gritted teeth and rolled my eyes as I went towards the basement, where, apparently, was the only place I could be. I went down the stairs and sat down into the chair at first, but then remembered the lock Jungkook gave me on a first day. I opened the desk drawer, took packaged lock and hurriedly unpacked it. My fingers were slightly shaking from the sudden rush of adrenaline, making it hard to fit the key in the keyhole. It took a while, but the lock was finally on the door.

I went to the bed then, put a blanket on and curled up into the ball. I really wanted to cry, but some sense of pride didn't let me. That felt bad, but so good at the same time. It meant that I hadn't lost my mind yet. Not entirely, at least.

A few moments later, Jungkook got downstairs. I didn't really see that as I was under the blankets, but honestly, who else that could have been? He tried to open the door once, then again, then probably noticed the lock that I put on.

"Tae?" He called, not sounding even a bit apologetic. "Can you let me in?"

I grunted lowly and kicked my leg into the blanket.

"Just go to hell you prick," I spat out with all the venom I had in me, with everything I had holed up. And it was a lot, considering that I was a very, very polite person. "Come back when, well, I don't know, maybe when you will snap out of your possessiveness over something you don't own and will be actually willing to let me go outside."

"Tae, I lo-"

"Shut up!" I screamed and dragged down the blanket, so that he could get a full view of my raging face. "Finish those words and will kill myself for sure! It's still better than what I am having right now, I will lose my mind at this rate!"

And it got him. He paled, his eyes watered slightly and I could see how he forgot to breathe in. That moment captured him.

"Well, you're the reason I lost mine," he replied with a hitched breath coming from his mouth, but didn't really wait anymore. He turned on his heel and went back upstairs, and, God, how much I wanted to call for him. I knew I won't be able to get a good night's sleep without him.

But at this point it wasn't just principles anymore, it was way more than just a simple lover's quarrel. If I would had submitted to him, it would had been the end of everything for me.

So I didn't.