Change Me

Chapter 17: "Look, I'm sorry."

[ CJ's POV ]

Matapos ang mahabang pag-uusap namin, sinabihan nya ako na ayaw nya na akong kausap. "I don't feel well. Stop talking to me and let me rest. " that's what he told me. Yep, he could really be a total jerk most of the time. Pero sobrang saya ko lang para pansinin 'yun, the fact that our conversation ended well earlier.

His temperature was still literally like burning kaya ipinasuot ko sa kanya ang malinis nyang sweatshirt na kinuha ko sa wardrobe nya (and I was practically like sending his abs my grievous farewell kase 'di ko alam kung kailan ko ulit ito makikita or kung makikita ko pa ba ito. Pardon my exaggeration).

Nung nakatulog na sya, 'di ko maiwasang titigan lang sya. Para akong ewan kung tingnan pero I grabbed the opportunity para titigan sya.

His peaceful breathing was so soothing and he looked a hell of a lot more cuter when he's asleep. Mas gwapo syang tingnan ngayong wrinkle-free ang noo nya.

Without thinking, I ran my fingers through his silky hair. And God, it felt so good. Pero agad ko itong binitawan nang bahagyang gumalaw ang ulo nya, clicking his tongue with a sigh, his eyebrows pulled together.

Please, 'wag kang gumising. Waaaaaaaah.

I sighed in relief nang dahan-dahan itong tumigil sa paggalaw. Muntikan na.

Bigla kong naalala ang peklat nya. It's a shame, ilang Linggo ko na syang kasama pero wala parin akong alam tungkol rito.

I inched closer towards him, making sure to minimize my movements para 'di sya maggising. Nag-alinlangan ako nung una, pero dinaig parin ako ng kagustuhan kong kunin ang kamay nya. Iniangat ko ng kaunti ang manggas ng sweatshirt nya at tiningnan ang peklat na nakatago.

I really feel sorry for him. He probably lost his good qualities because of this. Kung ano man ang dahilan, siguradong malaki 'yun kase naging ganito sya ngayon.

I lowered my head. I couldn't believe that I'm actually doing this but I left a chaste kiss on the scar. "You're gonna be ok." I whispered and kissed it once more bago ito binitawan, gently placing it back to his side.

I don't know. I just felt like kissing his scar. A part of me believed na somehow, makatulong ang halik na 'yon sa paglimot nya sa nakaraan. And now my lips were addicted to his skin.

CJ, you're gonna put yourself in deep trouble kapag pinairal mo yang kalandian mo, I warned myself. I placed his arms back to his side at inayos ang pagkakalagay ng ulo nito sa unan nya.

A couple of minutes later, he started to stir. At first, akala ko gising na sya. Pero hindi. His head started to toss and turn. Magkasalubong na naman ang mga kilay nito and he was muttering incoherent words in his sleep, sighing heavily.

"Justin." I whispered, shaking him a little.

"No..." he whispered under his breath, grunting. "Stop... Help..." he fisted his blanket violently at 'di parin tumiligil ang paggalaw ng ulo nito.

I cupped his cheeks, lightly shaking it. "Justin... wake up." ang init nya and he was delirious with fever.

"T-tama na..." medyo malakas na pagkakasabi nya. "Stop..."

That's when I freaked out. "Justin," my voice louder than before. "Justin, wake up." I tried to wake him up again, shaking him with more force. He was sweating, his chest heaving from breathing heavily. "Justin, wake-"

He finally shot up. He sat there on his bed, eyes wide open, still catching his breath. Nang tumingin sya sakin, dalawang bagay lang ang nakita ko sa mga mata nya; he was scared and vulnerable.