lemon boy

FOOLS

synopsis: a continuation of can i be him.

lyrics: oh, our lives don't collide, i'm aware of this
the differences and impulses and your obsession with the little things you like stick, and i like aerosol
don't give a fuck, not giving up, i still want it all only fools fall for you

italics - flashback

flashback

          TJ SAW MARTY standing off the distance, talking to reed about who knows what. neither of them had seen him coming, so slowly he walked up behind him and slid his arms around his waist, making marty jump and reed laugh. "hi." tj whispered, resting his chin on marty's shoulder.

marty smiles and turned around, now facing him with his arms around his neck, the only distance between them was their hoodies. "you scared me, asshole." he whispered back, tj only smiled and pulled him in closer, planting his lips on his.

"oh come on, get a room." reed complained, marty pulled away, throwing his head back and groaning. "i'm stealing him, now." tj grabbed marty's hand and ran in the opposite direction, "where are we going?" marty laughed as they ran through the halls of the school. the bell rang, signaling first period was starting.

"anywhere but here." he replied, swinging marty around so his back was up against the wall. "let's ditch, yeah?" marty smiled, pulling his hood up and nodding.

          CYRUS SLOWLY SLID his fingers into tjs, "you okay?" he asked quietly as the stood in the hall. they were walking back to their dorm room before tj stopped abruptly. tj locked eyes with him, and everything seemed to slip away, all the previous thoughts, all the stress, everything. the only thing he could think about was his eyes and the way they stared back at him. "yeah, i'm okay." he replied with a light smile.

flashback

          TJ SAT ON his bed, scrolling through anything he could find on his phone. a small tapping noise came from his window, causing his head to snap up in that direction. he checked the time quickly before furrowing his eyebrows. 12:47. he couldn't see anything from his bed, so slowly he got up and walked over to it.

and sitting on the other side was none other than marty, his boyfriend. he opened the window, allowing marty to climb through. "it's the middle of the night." he said, going back to sit on his bed.

"and i'm bored, let's go down to the lake." marty whined, falling down onto his bed next to him.

tj leaned back, making them lay next to each other. "right now?" he asked, looking over at him, only to find him already looking. "yep, come on. it's summer and i'm bored." tj sighed, only to smile next. he sat up and walked over to his dresser, pulling out a pair of shorts. "did you bring towels?"

"they're in my book bag, i left it outside." he quickly threw on a hoodie and a pair of shoes and before he knew it they were climbing back out the window.

          TJ JUMPED UP as he felt his bed bounce, he let out a small yelp and found cyrus staring back at him. for a minute he was in shock, looking around trying to find out what the hell just happened. once he heard cyrus' laugh it brought him back. "cyrus?"

he sat up and watched as cyrus caught his breath from laughing so hard, "what're you doing up? what time is it?" cyrus finally met his eye, "it's almost 3."

"in the morning?" he smiled and stood up from tjs bed, "come on." cyrus grabbed his hand and pulled him up, "i'm hungry."

tj ran his fingers through his hair, "you woke me up at 3 am because you were hungry?" even if he was still half sleeping, he couldn't help but smile at cyrus' messy hair and soft smile. "well i didn't wanna go alone."

"go where, exactly?" cyrus shrugged, "i don't know, we could walk around until we find somewhere."

"i hate you, you know that right?" tj said, not hiding the smile that creeped onto his face. "no you don't."

"no, you're right. i don't." tj pulled cyrus into him, making the distance between them almost nonexistent. "and you're so lucky." he only heard a small part of cyrus' giggle before his lips were on his.

tj hated this, he hated that anytime cyrus did anything he drew it back to marty. it wasn't like he still loved marty like that, it was just, they have a lot of history. he kept thinking, would cyrus have his heart like marty did?

but he found the answer, no. he wouldn't. because cyrus stole it, he stole it when he least expected it and held it safe in his arms and never let it go. it was beyond his control.

marty was different. he gave him his heart, he put it all out there and let him have it. marty didn't steal anything, marty didn't make him feel the way cyrus did. marty was his teenage dream.

he wanted this to be the last time he ever compared them, the last time he ever had to put himself through that because it wasn't fair to cyrus or to himself.

marty. the guy who made him happy throughout high school. the guy who made him live, made him want to go out and have fun. his love consumed him, made him not think of anything else but him. he was so connected to him, that breaking it off hurt to even think about back then. he fell for marty. he never knew if they would last. he always knew he was temporary. the feeling of love felt so right with him. as time grew, things weren't the same. he was good for marty.

cyrus. the guy who made him smile. the guy who's hair he liked to play with. the guy who kissed his cheek before he left for his classes. the guy who made life so easy. the guy who he never expected to like this much. he grew with cyrus. he never wants it to end. he can't imagine life without him. the thought of him felt so right. as time grew, things only got better. cyrus is good for him.

he looked up from his notebook and across the room over at cyrus, who was on his laptop typing away, glasses on, messy hair, and pajamas. and there, he saw cyrus. he saw him sitting there and thought
'i could sit here for the rest of my life, just having him in the same room with me, and be okay. i only need him'

because when he was with marty, when they were together, if they weren't doing something, they were bored.

he was done comparing them two because they are incomparable. marty was his past, cyrus is his future. he loved marty, he's in love with cyrus.

things are going to be okay now.

authors note !
idk what this is and it's really bad lmao
anyways i had like 20 different ideas and then i like,, put them all in one and now here's this.
that's why it's all over the place at the end
i'm gonna start posting again so i can get back into my writing mode because i'm ashamed of this fisjsjs