being the little brother.

Your family get used to it

People always say that writing says a lot about how the writer felt at the time so in this chapter I will be blowing off some steam and if it offends someone then I'm sorry. I'm trying to be less of a brat but if I bottle up my anger then I'm going to get worse. I know I said I wasn't going to update during the holidays but I just hit 6k so sod it

Erik's pov
I hated it here. We were trapped. It's like we're in a zoo. They say we're free but we're not. We're stuck here. And the people here are really stuck up on themselves. Or there just not grateful. For example a very loud therapist cane in just days ago and I remember her face. I pointed it out and she goes pale.
"I have a relative working here but we don't like people to know we're related" I remember those words. She was angry but so was I. I would be so proud of my mum if she was happy and in a high place and yet these two completely ignored each other. I hate this place and the staff and just everything. Except jay. I loved jay and my brothers.
Jay hasn't talked to any therapist or worker here but yesterday the unimaginable happened; he turned around and tapped Jake on the shoulder. I remember the word he spoke. So soft and painful, "Sorry" I don't remember what happened next I just welled up in tears and hugged him as soft as I could. We didn't push. We didn't ask why he was sorry. We just let his word sink into our heads. But he's getting there. Slowly.
Then today he's still facing our way and his eyes are open. You can see the pain in them. But other than pain there's guilt and saddens and suffering. It seems he's always crying. But our baby's getting better.
I'm sitting up in bed reading what my brother was writing in his journal. The stupid zoo owners gave us all journals to write in. Only Sammy and Jake have used them I threw it in the trash when we got it. His writing said:
He looks worse than dead. I hate it. I wish I could just make him better. Make us all better but the years of suffering are finally catching up on us. We all told ourselves we were happy. I remember that vacation so well, we were laughing but it was all empty. Even the anger when jay was in the lake it was all fake. Now maybe we're getting help. No thanks to me. It's all my fault.
At this I stand up and grab the pen prom his hand. I cross out his last sentence. I give him a knowing look. We need to stop blaming each other for this. It's our parents fault not any of ours.

Jakes pov
I feel the pen being torn out of my grip. Turn my last line was crossed out. I look up at Erik as he hugs me. I don't know if he notices but he's crying. He hates this place. Every bit of it. Then I hear the door open again and in walkes that girls yesterday who was ashamed of having her mum to work with. Weirdo. Erik, clearly not thinking siad "Hey I saw your mum the other day she was looking nice" he was trying his best to act nicer to the people but it only ended up with him getting disapproving looks from everyone but jay. His protective instincts kicked in
" What she's your mum why are you acting like this"
"Oh my gosh how rude if I don't want it to be known it doesn't have to be" Erik was fuming. But he caught himself and just bottled up his argument for later.

Erik's pov
If I was in her position I'd be so proud of my mum. She needs to learn how to not get so worked up about stupid things and her mum to. There family they should learn to live with it.

Again sorry for any personal offense but I mean every word of it.