The Tears
Word Count: 1124
Pairings: 10th Doctor x reader
Warnings: Angst, Possible trigger, fluff
A/N: Feel free to drop me a request, and enjoy the story!
Summary: You had been running back from another near death experience. You had accidentally offended an alien race by yawning. Everything was fine, you and the Doctor had made it safely to the TARDIS but then you got the phone call. You should have cried, really you should have, but there were no tears.
............................................................
You laughed breathlessly as you ran into the TARDIS. The Doctor followed closely behind, slamming the doors closed quickly as arrows and spears hit them just seconds later. He shot you a playful glare and pretended to be offended.
"Great, I'll never be able to come back here again! I liked this planet Y/N! They have waterfalls that go up! UP!" The Doctor scolded playfully.
You rolled your rolled eyes, smiling nevertheless.
"How was I suppose to know that yawning was a declaration of war on this planet! I mean seriously yawning!?"
The two of you exchanged looks before breaking down in a fit of laughter again. The TARDIS shook as she left the planet. Once she was safely floating in space the Doctor turned to you. You raised an eyebrow already knowing what the trench coat wearing Timelord, was going to ask you where you wanted to go next.
"We nearly died Doctor, give me a minute." You laughed.
He opened his mouth to protest but the phone rang. He picked it up as you turned leaning against the railing.
"Oh hello Ms. Harper!" He said cheerfully.
You gave him a confused look. Why was your landlady calling? The Doctor looked over at you.
"Y/N? Yes she's right here!"
He held the phone out for you, and once you grabbed it went to mess with the controls on the console. You knew he was listening though, you shot him a look and he pretended to be busy.
"Hello Ms. Harper. Is everything alright? I'm sure I've paid my rent for this month." You said.
'Oh Y/N, dear, I'm so sorry.'
Your heart stopped with those words. You felt your blood run cold as she told you that your roommate died. You wordlessly hung up the phone. Your best friend, your roommate, the only family you had left, was gone. She'd been with you since you were seven years old, since you'd had no one else. Now she was gone, died in a car crash. You vaguely registered the Doctor calling your name. It wasn't until he grabbed your arms that you realized you hadn't been moving.
"Y/N, what's wrong? What happened?" He asked worried.
"(F/N).... she uh, she died a few hours ago, car crash." You muttered.
"Oh Y/N, I'm so sorry." The Doctor pulled you into a hug.
You stood there emotionless, funny Ms. Harper had said the same thing to you. Why were they sorry? What good did sorry do? You pulled away giving the Doctor a forced smile.
"The funeral is tomorrow, can... can we go now?" You asked barely above a whisper.
"Of course, you go get ready, take your time Y/N." The Doctor said.
You turned around leaving the room. He frowned as he watched you disappear down the hall. You didn't cry, your (Y/E/C) eyes never even got misty. He pushed the thought from his mind, perhaps you were just in shock. However, he noticed you didn't tear up when the two of you got to the funeral home. You didn't cry when your friend's family came up to you hugging you in tears. You didn't cry when you saw her in the casket, and you didn't cry when they lowered her into the ground. You just didn't cry.
"I think I'm going to bed early tonight Doctor." You said.
"Y/N, it's ok to cry you know. You don't have to be so brave right now." The Doctor called after you.
You paused but didn't turn around.
"I haven't cried since I was six Doctor. Why start now?"
You started to walk to your room, and he looked after you surprised. Your voice was so devoid of emotion it broke him a little. He ran after you grabbing your arm.
"Wait, what do you mean you haven't cried since you were six? Everyone cries Y/N!" He said.
You pulled your arm free and turned to face him.
"Not me. I don't cry Doctor."
You said it so casually it worried him. He frowned and grabbed your arm when you tried to walk away again.
"No, no, no. We're talking Y/N. Why don't you cry, it's a perfectly normal response to things that make us upset."
You felt yourself growing frustrated.
"Let go of me, Doctor."
"Most people feel better after crying too."
"Let it go Doctor."
Your chest felt like it was tightening.
"I'm not just going to let it go Y/N! You haven't cried since you were six! That isn't healthy!" He said sternly.
"Why do you care!?" You yelled.
The Doctor took a step back in shock, you rarely ever yelled at him. He looked at you sadly.
"Because I care about you Y/N." He said like it was obvious.
You ran a hand through your hair in frustration. You let out a muffled groan.
"Crying is weakness Doctor. Crying makes you pathetic!" He looked at you in shock and for a moment he was silent.
"Who told you that?" He asked so quietly you almost didn't hear.
You debated on ignoring the question and hurrying to your room. That wasn't fair to him though, he was just worried about you.
"Everyone."
The word cut through the air like a knife. He opened his mouth to protest but you cut him off.
"You weren't the one pushed into lockers or laughed at because you cried if a freaking ladybug died. You didn't get picked on or even hit because you were a 'cry baby'! They didn't taunt you and exclude you!" You snapped.
The Doctor frowned and looked at you sadly. It finally made sense now.
"You were bullied as a kid..." He muttered.
You said nothing just turned away you made it five steps before he quickly grabbed you, pulling you into a tight embrace. You fought against him, hitting his chest, but he held tight.
"It's okay to cry Y/N. It doesn't make you weak, it doesn't mean you're pathetic. What happened to you as a kid was unfair. It was wrong. You've just lost someone so close to you, if you need to cry it's ok to Y/N. I won't think any less of you." He said softly.
You quit struggling and shook your head.
"No... I don't cry... I just don't..." You sobbed.
Your knees gave out and the Doctor sank to the ground with you, still holding you close. You sobbed into his chest, and he blinked away his own tears.
"I don't cry..."
"You are crying Y/N, you're crying right now and it's ok. I don't think any less of you. I think you're so brave." He murmured.
He held you tighter as you soaked his shirt with tears. You were crying for the first time in so many years.
"It's ok Y/N. It's ok."
