Dear Diary,
Have you ever felt like the whole world is caving in on you and there's nothing you can do to stop it? That's how I feel everyday. I constantly feel like i'm suffocating and I hate it. I don't want to feel this way anymore, I can't handl...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Dear Diary,
I had always believed that I was going through the worst and had the worst life but i'm now reconsidering. I've seemed to overlook the fact that there are people with much worse things happening to them and i'm out here acting like it's the end of the world that people that I won't even remember existed in a couple years time don't like me. I wish I could have this frame of mind all of the time and not just when i've witnessed someone be physically and verbally abused. I'm so weak and I want to help but I don't know how.
I decided that I was going to avoid Jungkook, even more than I already was. I wasn't going to let him get hurt just because he had some weird wish to be my friend. Though it wasn't my fault that Jungkook was hanging around me, I couldn't help but feel guilty.
Once again, Jungkook was already in class and sat in my old seat. He was looking around the class as if he were waiting for someone and his face lit up when he saw me, a small bunny smile spreading across his handsome features.
But it instantly fell again when I sat in a chair that was at the other side of the room to him, not even casting a look to him. I could tell he was confused and a little hurt but I was doing this for his own good, it would stop his brother being so harsh on him.
No, I didn't have a crush on Jungkook or anything like that but I still had a heart and cared about what happened to him. It was just humane, to care about the wellbeing of others. Well, that was my excuse.
I could handle being alone as I always had been but it had been nice to have his affection and attention while it lasted. Now it was time to get back to reality and the reality was that I was meant to be alone in this school, not hanging around with a handsome, bunny looking guy.
Once the students piled in the classroom, just as they had the day before, the seat beside Jungkook was instantly taken by a beautiful blonde girl called Jennie. Everyone knew her and she was sweet enough, the perfect replacement for me. Jungkook's brother would definitely approve of her.
I watched out of the corner of my eye as they happily talked, a stab of sorrow hitting my chest at the thought of it. Jealousy, why was I feeling this way? This was what I'd wanted so why did it feel so bitter sweet to see his attention on somebody else?
Jungkook didn't even spare me a glance the entire class. Maybe he was just lonely and I was the only person that he dared to approach. Wonderful.
After class I made my way into the school library as I had a free period to catch up on homework or to read my favourite book.
I loved the peace and quiet of the library as not many students bothered to go in there. It was mostly occupied by the chess club of students that were trying to finish their homework last minute.
High school students are extremely good at procrastinating, I can relate.
