A/N: this is literally how I feel and it seems more like a rant about my life
Social anxiety was rough for me. I wanted to hide from everyone, I didn't want anyone to notice who I was and what I was wearing. I kept trying but my mind kept telling me hypotheticals. One day I just wanted to slam my fucking head against the god damn desk, so it could fucking stop. But it never did.
I'm starting to realize something. I got an epiphany that I'm starting to like somebody. Genuinely like them. I never expected it to happen-especially now when I haven't in a while.
The boy's name was Lake. He was the cutest boy at this school. Me, my friends told me I looked like absolute garbage, and I didn't disagree with that. I never did. I knew he didn't like me, my anxiety kept telling me to stay away even though we are really close friends.
Like usual, I was going to talk to him at lunch, but I chickened out in a frenzy. Did I really like him? It would all be a waste of time. Stay away from him. I needed fucking help.
I run out in a panic, using my short legs to run as quick as I could, I mean I was a stamina runner in track. I bolted like I usually did. Panicking, I ran into somebody, oh fuck, I'm a fucking dumbass. I start to cry.
"Hey what's wrong?" the voice says softly.
I start to slowly look up and see Will, someone I knew from my Chem class who was close to Lake. He was extremely tall, brown haired, with brown eyes. I start to get even more scared. I need to fucking leave. I'm pissing him off.
The bell rings, and the next period is not Chem, lucky me. I walk through the halls, forgetting about friendships and relationships, because most of the time when I try at it, I fuck up. Emotionally, I gave up. I was fucking tired of this shit, ever since fucking freshmen year I was like this. It was like a full blow to the heart. With my type of anxiety, I learn to forget and everything is fine. But I knew. Nothing was fine, it would just come back soon, with somebody I would like. But for now, it needed to go away. Forever.
But Lake found me in the hallways. Surprisingly. He knew my whole entire schedule even though I tried to stop talking to him on many fucking levels. I wish it could all fucking stop. I wish it did. But it never did. Can he just fucking disappear?
"Hey, you missed lunch," he smiles. "I got you some of your favorite food."
I didn't want to eat. I didn't want to talk to him either. It would go like this after I knew I had a crush on somebody. I couldn't handle it. It was hard for me to because I felt like a burden to fucking society. Never again. Never fucking again. But I didn't want him to judge me by not eating it, so I pecked at the fries.
"So why weren't you at-"
"Oh sorry gotta go to class!!!"
**lake gotta eat all that food now**
YOU ARE READING
short crush / love stories
Romance❥ if anyone wants to read this requests! also you can request imagines ❥ Edit : these writings were created when I wanted somebody to fix my happiness. But I recently realized you have to be happy first they can't change that for you The stories a...
