BNHA - gay shipped one shots.

Sick - TodoDeku

//OK. THIS ISN'T PART OF THE LAST CHAPTER,, SO LIKE. YEET\\

I'm done.

how weak,

pathetic,

stupid,

dare I say, Ill fitted?

I'm not sick, I'm just different, right? right?

My minds just different. Not the same. Everyone else is Ill, they need the help, not me, right?

They're blind. Blind too how shit this world is. Blind to how horrid everyone around them is.

The judgement, the stares, thoughts, the shadows, no one else seems to notice.

Now's the time to shine, people will finally notice me now, I wont be invisible, or small, forgotten, hated. People will suffer, I know this, but do you know what else I know? I'm beyond caring. I'm so fucking far from it.

I grabbed the plastic cup off of the bench, I could see it from where I was sitting on the floor, I could see the water shimmering within the white plastic. I placed down the bloody blades neatly on the floor, my crimson red fingers shaking, I put the cup to my lips, i could taste the powdery pills and the metallic of blood in my mouth,

In and out, One, two three.

I breathed gently in and out, then swallowed, placed another 4 pills on my tongue, and swallowed again. Again, again, again.

I felt so calm, relaxed, at peace, I was finally getting what I wanted. But my hands wouldn't stop shaking, and my breathing kept getting hitched in my throat. I watched as blood dripped down my fingers, onto the white tiled floor, the red droplets felt warm, but I felt cold, dizzy, the world was fuzzy. Ironic really, nothing was clear when I was up and going either. I laughed too myself, humming along to "Raging on A Sunday" Just a little longer now, I can feel it. the burning on my arms and thighs, and the searing and bubbling feelings in my stomach.  All I could do was laugh, Laugh at how ridiculously horrible everything has been until now.

"Izuku? What's so funny?"

I heard mums voice echo from the lounge room. She wouldn't mind, would she? She always told me too do what I thought was right after all. I shakily put the cup back up on the bench, heaving myself up, I covered my mouth, I couldn't throw it up, not after all this effort. I pulled down the sleeves of my jumper, they easily covered my hands. I wobbled around a little, then bent over to pull down the sleeve things on my tracksuit pants. Blood had already stained through them, but It didn't matter, nothing mattered anymore. I hobbled over to the bathroom door, the world shaking and moving under my feet. I clumsily opened the door to see mum standing on the other side.

"mum... mum!"

I smiled brightly, were the lights flickering? I tripped into her, this wasn't that bad, I wrapped my arms around her, squeezing her with what little energy I had left. I rested my head on her chest, closing my eyes, finally, Peace. I can sleep now right? I can stop holding on, I can stop trying. I felt the blood running down my legs, I felt it smudge against my arms because of the dark red sleeves. I felt the pain, I felt everything, and then I didn't My arms and legs went numb, I couldn't hold myself up.

I heard mums confused gasps, I felt her shaking me, But I couldn't respond, I couldn't form sentences, It was gone, it was all gone. All I was left with was the sound of mums agonized screeching, her feeble attempts to hurry along the ambulance, her sobbing.

"Izuku, It's-its's going to be fine. You're going to be O-ok"

She was choking on her lies, she knew it wasn't going to be Ok, she knew It wasn't going to be fine. So why was she repeating it? Sobbing it into my hair, was she saying it to me or her? Who was she trying to convince?