Life (Jessalyn's view)

A new Life

 Emery started to slowly recover. It took a long time and many hard days with many tears but by the end of that school year she was doing a lot better. We grew close as a little "family". I began to love Emery as if she was my daughter. It meant a lot to me that I was able to be such a huge influence on her life both emotionally and spiritually. 

 As summer approached, Taylor and I got very busy preparing for LDP. It felt like I didn't see much of Emery anymore because of all the preparations I was trying to do. While I was trying to figure out sessions and all the speakers, I got an amazing idea that Emery could lead a session or two while we were at Teepee village. I asked her, and with a bit of convincing she said YES. She was going to speak on God's love and trials. She also offered to share her testimony with the girls during guy/girl time. She seemed super excited about it but I knew she was still a bit anxious about it all. 

 The first weekend of LDP came and we were off to Teepee village with 24 teenagers in grade 10, 11, and 12. We arrived and everyone got settled into there teepee's. After we hung out and played games for the most of the evening.

 At 9:00 we had guy/girl time. The guys all went off into their teepee and the girls gathered around the cooking fire. We sat on logs and stumps in a lopsided circle.  I got up to speak.

"Hey girls, so this weekend we have a special guest with us, Emery. She has been living with Taylor and I this last year. She is going to be telling you guys more about herself this evening through her testimony. So I'll stop talking and let her talk," I said, then sat down on a stump near the fire pit. I prayed a quick prayer for Emery, that she would have strength and be confident. Emery breathed deep and then started.

"Hi my name is Emery. I was born in a non Christian home and only became a Christian at the age of 10. I have struggled with social anxiety since I was little and started struggling with general anxiety when I was 13. I have always hated social situations and talking to people. When I was 14 I came to LDP and met Jessalyn and Taylor. They became such amazing mentors for me and have become even more amazing in the past two years. After LDP and working at camp, I went back to school and some girls started to bully me. This made me extremely insecure and I started to hate my body. I started to throw up my food and stopped eating. I convinced myself that I was just making myself prettier and that is was ok. Soon I became so weak that I ended up in the hospital for a week and was diagnosed with anorexia. I didn't believe it was that bad and didn't really want to get better. I went to two different centres for rehab, but it didn't help. By the end of grade ten I was still not getting better. During this I stopped going to youth and stopped reading my bible. I didn't think God loved me anymore. Last summer I was allowed to work here at camp as support staff which really helped me get to the point of wanting to recover. After a while I came up with an idea that I wanted to live here at camp with Jessalyn and Taylor. Slowly everything worked out and I was allowed to come stay here. I slowly started to recover and grow in my relationship with God. Then this last February I had a horrible relapse to the point that I didn't even have enough energy to get out of bed. I got to the point where I wanted to die. I was in so much pain and had horrible depression and anxiety. When I got to the worst of it, I told Jessalyn that I wanted to die. She then told me that she knew God had more for me and that she didn't want me to die. That day I rededicated my life to God. I knew he loved me and that with him I could make it through. I'm still in the process of recovering but I know that if I continue to trust God, I will make a full recovery."

Everyone clapped when she finished. I was so proud of her for talking in front of people. that was a big thing for her and she got over it and did amazing. I just couldn't stop smiling. 

"Do any of you have any questions for Emery?" I asked.

"I have something to say," Melody, one of the LDP girls said. She stood up and began to talk, "I have dealt with anorexia for the last 5 months. Your story, Emery, really inspired me to cling to Jesus again. I didn't actually want to come to LDP but my parents told me that I had to because they already paid for it. Now I'm so happy that I came because I've met all of you amazing people and actually feel loved here. I believe God brought you, Emery, here to speak to me. I want to rededicate my life too," Melody said with tears flowing down her cheeks. Everyone came around Melody and hugged her then I looked at Emery with a "here you go" look. I knew Emery should be the one to pray for Melody. Emery put her hand on Melody's shoulder. She prayed,

"Dear Father, we have here Melody. She is such a beautiful girl and she knows that she has been drifting away from you. She would like to rededicate her life to you and follow you with all of heart."

"God, I want to come back to you. I have gone astray and am coming back. I'm sorry for all the mistakes and short comings. You are lord of my life!" Melody prayed.

"Amen!" everyone said in unison.