wHAT IN THE NAME OF GOD IS GOING ON LIKE I LEGIT JUST WALKED THROUGH THE FRONT DOOR TO FIND MY TWO BEST FRIENDS SMOOCHIN IT UP IN MY KITCHEN! MY KITCHEN!
but i still thank Ches for ordering me chinese food. chinese food is the only good thing on this god-forsaking planet. for example, chinese food isn't going to hate you or yell at you if you tell the girl they like that they have a Robert Downey Jr. shrine in their spare-bedroom closet.
side note : ( i so did not tell megan phellps that at the movie theater 3 and 7/32 years ago--definitely not me at all--it's not like i stay up till 2:36 a.m. every night manically laughing at her reaction and telling ash that i talk in my sleep--no no no.)
anyways, i'm angrily chewing up my mongolian beef and eggrolls right now. like, i'm not mad at ash or ches. i know that ashton wants a good girlfriend and that ches wants a good boyfriend, but really??? each other??? and thIS MONGOLIAN BEEF IS LIKE THE FLAVOR GOD TO MY TASTE BUDS JAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJA.
oh my god.
i just ran my hand across my leg.
it is so frockin hairy lawdy lawd
it is hairier than my aunt gloria's arms, and her arms are hairy enough to keep Nash Grier a 5,000,000 mile radius anyway from her.
meaning, i need to shave until the sinews in my legs tear and bleed.
i ship mongolian beef and eggrolls together more than ashton and chesley,
Colleen ♡
p.s. #mongrolls is canon, and #ashsley can suck Nash Grier's right buttcheek and eat my aunt gloria's arm hair for breaksfast
YOU ARE READING
confessions of a teenage nightmare || -a.i- •MAJOR EDITING•
Randomin which two young adults find themselves in the stickiest of situations when a old friend (maybe even nine old friends) stop by for a visit.
