Crafty Chameleon

I Will Not Kill My Team ... Maybe

Last Time:

What is the village hidden in the leaves in for?

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Mayhem, chaos, disorder, havoc, bedlam, pandemonium, tumult, uproar, turmoil, commotion, all hell broke loose, trouble, disturbance, insanity, madness, madhouse, and even maelstrom.

It really doesn't matter what word or phrase you use because there isn't anything that can fully comprehend the current state of Konoha ...

One district had all it's plumbing tweaked so that sewage came out of every faucet and shower. That district was the farthest away from Mina. He didn't want to risk Mina smelling that crap ...

The rest of the village was covered in paint and glue bombs. Every single civilian was either a colorful mess or stuck together in a big sticky ball of people ...

The food in the ninja compounds was spiked with a strong tasteless laxative ...

The soap in the Hyuga compound was laced with itching powder ...

The the anbu headquarters was rigged with sticky paint bombs in a lovely assortment of neon colors and feather traps ...

Nearly every bottle of shampoo was replaced with some strange glittery dye that was permanent ...

The clothes of all the ninja clan members had seals applied to them that turned the garments into frilly dresses, skirts, tutus and costumes like bunnies, chickens, maids, fairies, when worn. As a bonus the seals prevented henges and genjutsus to be placed over them  ...

It was bad!

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The newly instated fourth hokage was in the council chambers wearing a red demon costume with sparkly pink hair and stomach pains as he listened to the council members bitch.

"Hokage-sama, you have to stop him!" yelled a lime green haired Hiashi Hyuga who was wearing a orange strapless dress and scratching nonstop.

Danzo and Hiruzen casually strolled into the council chambers looking relaxed and refreshed. They burst into laughter the second they saw the ridiculous outfits ...

Shibi Aburame was in a fairy costume with orange hair ...

Tsume Inuzuka was wearing a bunny costume with bright blue hair ...

Choza, Inoichi and Shikaku were wearing pink tutus and seemed to be having problems with their stomachs ..

and the civilians smelled like shit ...

Tsume snapped, "Would you stop laughing and get your brat under control!"

Hiruzen glared, "Tell me, is Naruto a highly skilled monster or the deadlast of the academy? You can only pick one and if he isn't the monster you all treated him as then how could the deadliest accomplish something of this scale?"

Everyone now knew that he wasn't a demon, but if he didn't do it then who did? Danzo and Hiruzen mentally smirked. They couldn't believe that rational worked!

"Fine, but what do you mean 'treated him like a monster'? We never did anything of the sort!" A civilian council member argued.

Danzo smirked, "My ROOT agents have been investigating you all for years and I gave all of the information to Minato."

Another council member stood up and yelled, "You bastard! It wasn't our fault, we didn't know and you hated him too."

"Getting into your circle of trust was the only reason I pretended to hate Naruto, I even taped some of our conversations and hokage-sama ..." Minato looked at Danzo. "You haven't asked me how I sustained my injuries." He gestured to his bandaged right arm and right eye. "On Naruto's seventh birthday one villager decided to give Naruto a gift. Right after that the same villager became drunk and stated boasting about the special gift ... he was boasting to me about the gift, which was a bomb ... I managed to find Naruto and throw myself on top of him ... he never accepted any gifts from the villagers after that."