inspired▪︎tmr gif series

[36]▫️BITTER GOODBYE▫️newt

Imagine...

You become a Runner, desperate to find a way out of the Glade. But Newt is not happy about your plans...

You finish what has felt like a long, long day of work. Your aching feet drag you to the stream that runs through the woods. You kneel next to the water, splashing some over your hands to clean and soothe them. Droplets roll down your face after you throw some over your head. You imagine them to be tears because all you want to do right now is cry.

You walk back to the hammocks afterward. Instead of lying on your own, you go to Newt's. He is sitting on his, swinging slowly. His eyes meet yours as soon as he hears your footsteps come closer.

"Y/N! How's your first day with the Med-jacks been, love?"

He stands up and leans forward. You would usually greet each other with a peck to the cheek, but this time you pull back. Immediately, Newt assumes this means bad news.

"Something wrong?"

"No. I just.. I have something to tell you."

Newt stands up, then pulls you by your elbow to face him. "What's wrong?"

Minho's voice pops up in your head, telling you that you should be honest and straightforward. "You can't lie. Just tell him straight up."

"I'm going into the Maze."

Newt frowns instantly. "Wait.. what?"

"I know you made me promise the first time I said I wanted to, but... I can't sit here anymore, gardening and cooking and bandaging the Slicers. I need to do something that's going to help us."

Newt's mouth falls agape. He blinks a few times, shaking his head. "Are you joking? You better be joking."

You shake your head. "Newt, please. Don't make this harder than it already is."

Newt suddenly turns harsh. "You're such a shank! Why the hell do you want to rush your life. You know how dangerous it is in there! I've lost so many of my friends, and now you expect me to let my girl/boyfriend go-"

"Let!? It is not your choice Newt! It's mine!"

"Fine! Go. Get yourself stung and see if I care!"

Your eyes tickle with the threat of tears. You hold back. "Newt.. please. I'm trying to help us all. I'll be alright. I will.."

You reach out to touch Newt's hand, but he pulls away. "I can't love someone who is going to risk their lives every single day. How will I sleep? Eat. Breathe."

You catch Newt's eyes. "Newt... I have to go."

"No. You think you are acting bravely, but you've never looked more stupid."

You stare into Newt's eyes for a few seconds more, but it feels like a lifetime. A small part of you wants to crush him into a hug. Tell him you'll stay. He's right: it is too dangerous. Plant a million 'I'm sorry' kisses on his perfect face.

Another part knows that you have to find a way out of this place. That may be when you do, you and Newt will be happy. This disagreement will be a distant memory.

But, there's no way to know anything for sure.

"I love you." You mutter before you turn around and start to walk away.

Newt doesn't say anything as you head straight for the Maze doors.

You don't dare glance back.

-

Final edit: 2.11.20