inspired▪︎tmr gif series

[9]▫️AS THE FIRE DIES▫️newt▫️[part 2]

¤trigger warnings; blood, death/suicide.

-

Imagine...

Newt's reaction when you are scratched by a Crank...

When you hear footsteps approaching, you quickly swipe at your eyes. "H-hey." You don't hear an answer, so you look up to see who it is. Newt stands above you. His hand flies up to cover his mouth.

"Y/N.." You squeeze your eyes shut. He must have seen the scratches. "How.. oh god- how long have you been there?" Newt falls down beside you. 

"Long enough." You whisper, barely audible. "Shit. Newt- I- I just noticed them myself.."

"No." His head falls onto your unmarked shoulder. "This isn't happening.. not you."

"Newt... I know- I know this is.. bad, but I don't wanna become one of those.. things-"

Newt looks up with teary eyes and furrowed brows. "No- don't ask me to do.. to do.."

"I'm not." You look to your friends, pointing at them. "But you have to let me do it. Please. And I don't... I don't want them to know. At least.. until after. I can't bear seeing them when-"

You watch Newt as his eyes wander all over your face. Never, ever had you seen him look this broken. "Y/N, I-"

His hand reaches for yours. You place your palms together. Slowly, your fingers slide between his, fitting together like a puzzle. You cover your joined hands with your free one and squeeze.

"I don't wanna leave you either...any of you. And... I know.. I should have said this a long time ago.. but I-" You take a deep breath, gathering yourself. You look him in the eyes and smile. "I love you, Newt. I always have. Ever since you lifted me out of that box, I just had this.. feeling," you lift a hand to cover your heart that is beating faster than ever, "right here."

You watch a tear fall down his face, then wipe it away with your thumb. He shakes his head. "Love, how am I supposed to let you go when you say something like that?"

You giggle. You don't mean to, but it just comes out. "I'm sorry. It's the truth."

*

You let an hour or two pass. You aren't sure, as it passes by so slowly. You just sit and hold each other. Until you can't anymore. Delaying what needs to happen won't make it any easier, and the pain worsens by the minute.

*

"Newt... It has to be now... I can already feel it spreading."

His eyelids close for a few seconds. When they open again, he leans forward on his knees. Carefully, he puts his hands on either side of your face and then kisses your cheek. He rests his forehead against yours. "I do too, by the way... I love you."

You pull your knife from the lowest pocket of your trousers. "Newt.. tell them I'm sorry. Please.. after.. tell them I love them all." You nod against him, before pulling away and turning around, so as not to look at your love so broken.

Then you notice Thomas shifting. He sits up and looks around, and when his eyes land on the scene ahead, Thomas quickly rises. Before he can reach you to stop it, you lift the knife to your chest. You turn your head slightly, in the direction of Newt and smile. "I love you... so much." A single, final tear slides along your face as you close your eyes and clutch the knife tighter. "I'll be looking over you."

***********************

Newt catches your body and gently shuts your eyes. He chokes on a sob as he kisses both of your cheeks in turn and then whispers, "I'll see you soon, love."

**

He spends the rest of the night clinging to your body. He brushes hairs from your face and stares into the fire. Only small flames flicker now, the light only barely revealing the details of your face. Embers float around, rising up and then disappearing as they descend and disintegrate into nothingness.

- 

Final edit: 27.10.20