Learning To Live

Chapter 14: Soaring

"Lia, I really like you."  Kai bit his lip, looking at me expectantly.

"I think I like you too.  I've never felt this way before, so I can only assume that's what it means."  I rambled a little, blushing when I stopped.  I looked down at my lap, nervous to look at his face.  He let go of my hand and wrapped his arms around me.  I snuggled into his chest, relishing the feeling of being entirely safe and warm.

"If your answer is nothing, that's alright.  But I need to know what you want to do about us."  Kai spoke softly, nothing but kindness in his voice.  I shrugged, knowing there was no answer I could give that wouldn't make me feel awkward.

"Let me ask you this; would you ever consider dating me?"  I could hear the nerves in his voice.  I nodded, not really trusting my own voice.

"Know that I'm not rushing you in the slightest.  Just feel free to let me know when you're ready."  He smiled, nudging me gently.

"Maybe I'm ready now."  I bit my lip, looking into his eyes.  I tried to ignore the aggressive nervousness I felt in my stomach as I waited for him to respond. What if he changed his mind. What if he didn't mean he was actually ready right now?

"I was hoping you'd say that." His face broke into a smile, and he looked slightly relieved.

"Kai, I've never had a boyfriend before." I shifted uncomfortably on the couch, feeling extremely awkward.

"That's okay. I've never had a girlfriend before. We'll figure it out together." He winked at me, making the butterflies in my stomach go crazy.

"I'm kind of nervous..." I admitted. Honesty's the best policy, right?

"To be fair, I'm kind of nervous too.  First relationships are probably always a bit scary, but I think we can make it work."  He gently brushed the back of his hand against my cheek, and surprisingly, I didn't mind.  I didn't feel the need to flinch, or punch him, or run away; I was just fine with it. Why him though? Why didn't I feel this way about Kayson or Keoki? 

"I don't understand how you could like me.  I'm just about the worst of the worst."  I shrugged, truly wondering how his feelings came about.

"I couldn't love a seemingly perfect girl who never did anything wrong. It would be such a boring relationship. Besides, you're a really sweet girl and you're a lot of fun to be around. I'd be crazy if I didn't like you." He chuckled. I inhaled sharply as I felt my face burning from embarrassment.

"Well, you're the first guy I've been able to trust. Why? I don't know, but I've never felt threatened by you. You've just shown me kindness and compassion; even when I was rude. So thank you for that." My embarrassment and nervousness started to slowly fade away when he smiled. His smile seemed to have that effect on me.

"Can we just stay here for a while?" I asked, never wanting this moment to end.

"There's nothing I'd rather do." He pulled me closer to him to the point where we were pressed up against each other; closer than before. Was this what it was like to cuddle? I mean, we kind of did this before, but we were asleep. I curled up and buried my face in his chest, breathing on his scent. He smelled lightly of saltwater, but mostly of the cologne he used. It was so foreign, yet so comfortable, to be this close with a man.

Kai and I sat and talked about anything and everything until the sky was completely dark. A yawn escaped my mouth before I could stop it, which made him yawn too. I expected him to call it a night so we could go to sleep, but he just leaned backward and laid down on the blanket.

"I'm not ready to go inside yet. Obviously not trying to insinuate anything, but we may as well just sleep here tonight." He sighed heavily, conveying how tired he was.  I was a little shocked, but not worried or anything.  Would his mom allow this?  I forced my brain to stop thinking, and to just lay down next to him.

"You can use me as a pillow."  Kai chuckled, and thankfully he couldn't see me blush in the dark.  I felt so awkward, but I couldn't show it.  He was my boyfriend now, right?  Boy did that sound weird; me having a boyfriend.

I laid my head on his chest, which was much more comfortable than I'd ever imagined it would be.  What if Leilani came out and caught us?  Would I be sent back home?  Or had he already told his mom about his feelings for me?  All of this was just too much to think about for now, so I decided it would be best just to get a good nights sleep.

"Goodnight, Kai."  I whispered, not sure if he was still awake.

"Goodnight, Lia."  He responded before yawning again.  I closed my eyes, but sleep wouldn't come.  I laid awake for what felt like an hour, just thinking about Kai.  If anything else would've kept me up, I probably wouldn't been pretty mad; but I didn't mind thinking about him.

Kai's slow and steady breathing told me that he was asleep, and the feeling of that started to lull me to sleep too.  So after laying awake for an hour, I finally got to sleep.  It was probably the best night of sleep I'd ever had in my entire life, and it was all because of Kai and how safe he made me feel.  I'd have to remind myself to thank him for it one day.

My dreams were all entertained the idea of Kai.  Dating, marriage, maybe even kids one day; but again, I wasn't complaining.  I almost didn't want to wake up in the morning.

I just had to hope that one of his brothers wouldn't find us in the morning...