I Hate Her | Park Jimin

CHAPTER FIVE

As the three people move out, you quickly press the top button, a man running in a distance to your direction, signaling you to wait but you press a button fast and the elevator doors close. Leaving you alone now.

You let out a breath. You leaned onto the wall, so impatient to get to the top floor.

Your suck in a deep breath the moment you heard a ding. You look at the empty hallway. You walk out the elevator. Walking straight ahead, at the very end, there was a door.

As you look at it, it was slightly open, someone might be up there or not. But you really don't care anymore. You push it wide open and there was a metal ladder, heading up the rooftop.

You could feel the cold air as you started taking steps up. There was another, but this one closed, so probably no one's here. You twisted the knob hoping it was unlocked.

You twisted again but it won't open. You twist it then push hoping it will open but it didn't.

The cold air, that peek through the small gap of the door hit your legs.

You keep on pushing it, pushing and pushing...getting angry and annoyed...

You started crying.

"Just let me out. I wanna die. I wanna jump there. Just open the fuck!" Tears fall out fast.

You tightly held the knob and push it again. Your hand break loose from the knob, you lower down, head on your bended knee, crying.

"Let me jump out there. Please...I-I- am tired of this life...just please..." You beg to particulary no one.

You look up, begging up to Him.

"I-I-I don't wanna be here...I am...useless...just let me...rest...I am...tired." You look up, tears falling out fast.

"I may have a complete family, good friends, my life is good, I am not having some financial problems...but I don't know why...why I am feeling useless...like I don't deserve any of this? Like I should be out there suffering. I should be out there eating crumbs. Why do I felt like I didn't do anything to fulfill their expectations...why?"

You look back down the floor. "Why am feeling like this? Why am I like this? Why can't I be just like them? Why can't I be just...normal. Like no depression or any of this mental disorder shit. Why?"

Your back stiffens as you hear someone clearing a throat. You didn't turn, afraid that they will judge you, afraid that they will laugh at you, afraid that they will think, you're being ridiculous. They possibly will, cause they don't understand you. No one will understand you.

"Um sorry...I...um. I-sorry. I eavesdrop."

And you suddenly felt ashame, and embarass. Your fear coming. That they will laugh, and think you're just overreacting.

"I-you know. If you jump out there, it will hurt."

You wanted to turn and glare at him. But you don't want him seeing your state right now.

Looking so fucking weak and vulnerable.

"I know. That's why I'm here." You said gritting your teeth, annoyed for getting interrupted from your saddest momemt at the time. You wanted him away now so you'll try your hardest to be very rude so he'll leave.

"If only hyung is here. He will say some words that will hit you. He is rude you know, but a kind of rude that's in that right place. And a straightforward asshole. But that characteristic of him is what we like about him. He's a unique asshole...like me...like you, like everyone. He is amazing, like me, like you. Like everyone. God made us, the God himself, so we're beautiful individuals. You shouldn't waste your life, when you can do more to it. Where you can do more things to make yourself more useful. Shouldn't waste the greatest gift God had ever given."

But whatever I do, I am still useless.

"Before you think you can't do it. Before you think any negative thoughts, remember that you're still young. You have many things that's needed to be accomplished in your life."

You were silent there, listening to him and his words starts to sink in your mind.

"What would you wanted to be?"

And that's when tears starts to fall again.

If the door is open, if you jump out there, if you died, your dream, dies with you too. Your dream, your goals, your wants, suddenly flashes in your eye.

You suddenly felt, glad.

You came to realize things, because of him.

He helped you.

When times you badly needed help, never came. And now, it came. Why now? Why not earlier?

Atleast someone came to save you.

A savior came.

At the back of your head said. You can't believe it. That a stranger helped you. Not your family not your friends, but a complete stranger helped you.

You feel, saved. You feel greatful. Cause of him. You have to give him all your thanks. Every thanks you can give.

You slowly stood up. Your back legs hurt from having that position for long.

You lower your head down, still quite embarass on him

As you came to the end of the stairs, you meet with his shoe.

Everything went into a slowmotion, it might looked cliche now but it's happening.

You look up meeting his smiling, angelic face. You took a step back.

And his smile falls.

"Jimin?"

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this sucks i know

even you don't like, still thanks for reading...

thanks to no one who is reading this😂😂😂

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