Dye | Tyrus/Ambi

Part 6: All We're Doing Is Talking

TJ's POV

I watch as Cyrus walks away, and I instantly feel disappointed in myself. Why can't I just talk to him? Why am I so scared to let my friends know that I like him? I mean I like having him as a friend, not as more. I think. 

"Dude, you okay?" Lester asks, looking behind him to try to find where my eyes are set, but Cyrus is already gone.

"Yeah, I'm . . . fine."

I turn my eyes back to my friends, but my mind is still on the hurt look on Cyrus' face. All he did was say hi, and I ignored him. Why am I so attached to this? Why can't I let it go? He's just another guy who wants to be my friend. But for some reason, I want to be his friend more than I've ever wanted to be anyone else's. 

"TJ," Lester says, getting my attention after I space out again. 

"Yeah?" 

"I said are you going out with Chloe Friday?"

"Uh, yeah," I reply.

I am. Enough pressure from my friends convinced me to ask her out, but I'm starting to regret that decision. Why am I regretting this? I don't have anyone better to spend Friday night with. Right? Something about it just doesn't feel right. Maybe that's just nerves. It must be—though I've never felt nervous about a date before. 

I need to talk to Cyrus—fix things. I need to make sure he knows that I didn't mean to hurt him. 

_____________________________________

Cyrus' POV

My friends work around me in science, and I try to do the same, but every time I look back at the pages of To Kill a Mockingbird, my mind sends me off into an endless dive into thought. 

"Are you thinking about TJ?" Andi asks, noticing my inability to focus. 

"No," I reply. "Definitely not."

Andi gives me a distrusting look, and I sigh. 

"Okay, maybe a little," I admit. "I hardly knew him. I should be able to get over this."

"Give yourself a little time," Andi tells me. "I'm sure you'll forget about him by tomorrow." Then her eyes latch onto something behind me. "Or not."

I turn around in my desk to see TJ standing with a sad expression, looking right at me. 

"Hey, Cyrus," he says. "Can I talk to you?"

"Really?" I respond, a tad shocked. "You completely ignored me earlier."

"I know. I just—let me explain."

His sorry eyes burn into me, tugging at my heartstrings. I glance around at my friends, all who are scowling at the boy who hurt me, Buffy especially. 

"Fine," I finally say. 

I get up to follow TJ out into the hall, brushing off the disapproving looks from my friends. When we're away from the doors, TJ runs his hand through his hair again, keeping his eyes on the floor until he speaks and locks them onto mine. 

"I'm sorry about earlier," he says. 

"Okay," I respond, "but why couldn't you at least acknowledge me in some way? If you don't want to be my friend, that's okay. I just need you to tell me."

"I want to be your—your friend," he assures me as soon as I finish speaking. "It's just that my friends are pretty, well, obnoxious, and they think everyone we associate with needs to be cool—"