Mirrorless

Chapter 11

Decorated in pain,
Numbing red flows.
Yet she continues,
Disregarding scars.

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She was in that dark place again, the same vanilla perfume wafting over her, teasing her. In her head, she knew it wasn't real. There was no way that the parents who had abandoned her for years would suddenly come back to her.

She felt her mind wander about in the dark, feeling for something that could help her make sense of what was happening. And in the darkness, she saw the glint of something silvery. She reached towards it, willing her mind to go closer and closer to it.

And then she saw it. A mirror.

That couldn't be right. Mirrors everywhere had been smashed.

She stepped in front of it, but right before she could see her reflection, the dark swallowed her whole, whisking her away from the mirror.

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Lilian woke up, her shirt drenched in sweat. She no longer randomly passed out, but her nightmares came back every time she slept, more and more vivid as the days passed. Every day, when she woke up, she searched for a meaning behind her dreams, but failed to find one. And last night, she had seen a mirror.

After that freak accident at the beginning of the academic year, Lilian's small college town refused to bring in more mirrors out of fear that another such incident would occur. Her town was tucked away in the hilly forests of Maine; a small, mostly unknown town called Woodworth. The town consisted of basically only the university, apartment complexes, some individual houses, a few essential stores and a few clubs riddled through town that turned a blind eye to drunk, underage college students.

Lilian shook her head, confused with the increasingly confusing nature of her dreams. She slid out of bed, preparing to get ready for classes. She hadn't been to lectures for a while, and she was grateful that none of her professors required attendance. It had given her the time to heal and get over the heartbreak that had left her both devastated and penniless.

When Lilian stepped out of her room, Lucille was already at the stove, frying up some mouth-watering pancakes. Lilian always wondered where Lucille had learn to cook so well. According to her, her parents were the most horrendous cooks the world had ever seen.

Noticing Lilian step out of her room voluntarily looking presentable for the first time in ages, Lucille broke out into a wide grin.

"You're back."

Lilian smiled back.

"Yeah, guess I am."

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Lucille shamelessly ogled the boys in the college football team as they jogged around the stadium in a neat line. They had been working out on the field for a while now, and their damp shirts clung to their well built bodies, which had captured Lucille's undivided attention.

Lilian rolled her eyes.

"Stop staring and get to work on your essay, I'm not doing it for you again."

Lucille pouted.

"Aw, come on, we don't always get to see a bunch of hot sweaty guys working out."

Aaron studied the football team and then shrugged, his expression unimpressed. But then again, he always look unimpressed.

"They're too hunky. I don't understand why you're so obsessed with them."

Lucille made a face at Aaron.

"You're just jealous because you'll never be that hunky."

Aaron shook his head, turning back to his laptop.

"I don't want to be that hunky."

As the other three resumed their work, Lilian took the opportunity to study Aaron. He claimed that their group of four were his closest friends, but he still remained a mystery. Being a person of very few words, he very rarely opened up about his family or his life before college. Lilian had hoped his silence was just initially shyness at meeting someone new, but Aaron still maintained his very cool, undisturbed exterior.

Lilian had never seen him look upset, but Lucille and William repeatedly claimed that he had been scarily upset the day that Calix had broken up with her. It touched her heart a little, that he cared enough to break his normal emotionless state on her behalf. He had often been there when she was lonely; on Christmas when everyone else left and after the breakup when she had been isolating herself.

Lilian could feel a deeper fondness building in her heart for him, one she tried to shake away. She couldn't like him. Not so recently after having her heart broken by someone who had claimed to always be by her side.

William waved a hand in front of her face, jarring her out of her thoughts.

"You good there Lils?"

William's face was oddly blank. Lilian frowned slightly at that. William was probably the most expressive person she had ever met; even Lucille hid her emotions at times. But never William. Lilian nodded slowly.

"Um. Yeah, sorry I was just zoning out."

Lilian could feel her face heat up as William's blank gaze locked on her. She was unsettled at the utter lack of emotion. Eventually, William nodded and turned back to his laptop, typing away furiously. Lilian sighed, and turned back to her own screen, wondering if William had caught her staring at Aaron.

'He must've. Otherwise, there's no explanation for that weird stare he was giving me.'

Lilian shook her head, her face growing warm. She was embarrassed, but now was not the time. She could talk to William about it later. That is, if he wanted to talk to her. Lilian kept her focus on her work from then onward, afraid of getting caught staring again. At times, she felt like someone's gaze was on her, but no matter how much she wanted to look up, she refused to.

Soon, the sky grew dark, and the people in the field trickled out one by one. Lucille yawned loudly next to her, and Lilian finally looked away from her computer. Aaron shut his laptop with a neat click.

"Well, I'm done with my work. Where do you guys want to get dinner?"

Lucille immediately perked up at the mention of food, rapidly listing a list of places that the four often frequented. Lilian noticed, once again, that William was uncharacteristically silent as he packed his things into his bag. Just as Lilian opened her mouth to ask him what was wrong, he stood up.

"Hey, I'm gonna pass on dinner today. I've got a paper due tonight and I still need to work on it. I'm heading home."

Lucille enthusiastically waved him away, wishing him good luck on his paper. Aaron nodded too, before deciding on a restaurant to eat at. Lilian sat there, unsure of whether to chase after William or not. But before she could decide, William had disappeared into the night.

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Lilian turned in her bed for what felt like the hundredth time. She dreaded falling asleep as a result of the nightmares that plagued her every night. Eventually, however, she felt her eyelids grow droopy, and she settled, her arms wrapped around a spare pillow. Right as she was falling asleep, however, her door flew open, revealing a very panicked Lucille.

Lilian sat up in bed as the blonde began crying, babbling something that Lilian could not understand. Lilian padded over to the girl and wrapped an arm around her, leading her to an empty chair.

"Hey, calm down. What's going on?"

Lucille took big, gasping breaths like a fish out of water. Lilian clutched her hand, rubbing comforting circles on her back. Lucille took a deep breath before speaking.

"I-It's Wi-William.. th-the on c-campus ho-hospital c-called. H-He go-got admitted f-for al-alcohol p-poisoning."

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Oops. Don't kill me hehe