A Promise to a Crescent

Prologue

It's almost 2 am in the morning at hindi parin ako mapakali sa kakaisip sa kanya. After all this time, ngayon pa ako walang maggawa?

Pinilit kong bumangon tsaka umupo sa kama.

With my tears beginning to stream, I managed to think of something positive. Maybe, the prediction date isn't exact, or...

Shit! I'm fucked up! I can't even picture out myself after this, knowing he'd leave me with the peculiar pain and thousand shadows of bittersweet memories.

Pakiramdam ko ay nagyeyelo ang buong sistema ko. Tangina, ni hindi ko siya masisi! At ako? Wala akong maggawa! Wala akong maipaglaban, dahil sa umpisa palang malinaw na na naitakdang hindi kami maaari at kailanman hindi maaari para sa isa't isa.

Hinilamos ko ang palad ko kasabay ng mariing pagpikit. Diyos ko, sayo ko na siya pinapaubaya. Patawarin niyo po ako.

I deeply sighed, hoplessly.

A cool wind whispered to me from my window. I gasped before stepping towards there to close it, but a text message ringtone bothered me, and I never expected it from him.

Lucas:

How are you?

Me:

I'm fine

Namuo muli ang panibagong luha sa aking mga mata nang isend ko iyon.

Lucas:

You sure?

Me:

Yeah, I'm fine. You?

Lucas:

Tell me the truth.

Mabilis na bumuhos ang luha ko sa nabasa. Kasabay ng paghikbi ko ay ang pakiramdam na hindi ko maipagkaila...

I can't do this.

Me:

I miss you that it's ripping me into pieces. How can I just forget you?

Nanginginig na ako at tumingala para pigilan ang sarili. Now, I feel like dying.

Lucas:

I'm in front of your house. Baby, please come outside.

Nabuhayan ako ng loob sa nabasa ko at mabilis na dinungaw ang bintana para tignan. Mula rito sa itaas ay hindi ko siya matanaw at tanging munting liwanag lang mula sa ibaba ang nakikita ko na paniguradong phone niya.

Mabilis kong hinablot sa closet ang jacket ko at nagtip-toe pababa. I made sure that I passed the way fast and silently. I didn't even wore slippers dahil paniguradong may makakarinig nun.

"Lucas!" Hinihingal at sabik ko siyang mahigpit na niyakap.

Gently, he hugged back.

"Baby..." his voice broke, and I'm broke.

Pinilit kong huminahon bago ako kumalas. He towered over me and I tried to gaze him. Hinihipan ng mabining hangin ang medyo mahabang buhok niya. Nanatiling mapungay ang mga mata niyang nakadirekta sa akin.

I can read the million emotions his eyes are bringing, but one's standing out...

Pain...

"Come with me" his voice was husky.

Mabilis akong tumango at sumunod sa gusto niya. Bahala na. I'd rather make the remaining hours with him in pain and contented than spending the whole time alone in pain and will forever regret.

As we're walking the familiar way to somewhere we used to meet, the icy wind crescendoed, and only our hands, intertwined are feeling the warmth. Nilingon ko siya at kahit na medyo madilim ay malinaw kong nakikita ang maputla niyang labi. He clenched his jaw when he noticed me, staring at him.

"Please don't look at me like that"

My brows crinkled at his statement and I felt another weariness inside my heart.

Pareho kaming napahinto sa paglalakad at hinarap niya ako. Marahan niyang inangat ang baba ko para magtama ang tingin naming dalawa.

"From this day on, I don't want you to cry because of me. " he gasped "You know, what's keeping me from holding on is only you"

Hindi ko alam kung paano ko nakayanan ang titigan siya ng ganito nang nasasaktan. Damn, I love this man so much that I could just die too in his arms.

Tumingin siya sa kawalan at saka ko lang napansin na nandito na kami sa aming tagpuan.

Sa tapat ng malinaw na sapa ay ang punong mangga. Bumuhos lahat ng ala-ala at napasinghap nalang ako sa kabiguang nararamdaman.

The night stars scattered all over the dark sky, and the crescent moon lit and brought luminance in our scene.

"Lindsey..." he was almost a whispering to the moon.

"I promise..."

Matagal niyang tinitigan ang buwan nang hindi dinudugtungan ang mga salita. Bumagsak ang tingin ko sa mga paa ko. I can't bear with it, seeing him breaking and making such promise.

"I will come back for you"

A tear fell down and I gazed him. He was then looking to me with the same weary eyes.

"I promise that"

Umiiyak na ako nang marahan kong hinaplos ang pisngi niya. Hindi ko alam kung anong ibig niyang sabihin sa pangako niya gayong imposible naman sa isipan ko iyon.

Unti-unti niyang dinala ang kamay ko sa labi niya at isang marahang halik ang ginawad niya roon.

His lips are cold.

"Gabi-gabi akong dumadasal at nangungumpisal sa Diyos na mahal na mahal kita..."

The wind blew again then he tucked my hair on my ear. I blushed and thinked that this may be just a dream. Maybe I'm just trapped all along and maybe he doesn't exist.

"Gabi-gabi akong nagbabaka-sakaling pakinggan ako ng Diyos upang mapatunayan sa'yo na malinis at tapat ang intensiyon ng puso ko sa iyo."

Humikbi pa ako lalo nang malinaw kong nakita ang luhang namumuo sa kanyang mga mata. I've never seen Lucas in this such pain. Never in my wildest dreams.

He used to be brave and fighting.

"Sa pagsapit ng araw, at nang magiging saksi ka ng panghihina ko, nakikiusap ako... " he sighed, closed his eyes for a moment and opened for a renewal. This time, his eyes are really begging.

"Huwag ka nang magtangkang dalhin ako sa hospital..."

Bumuhos ang luha ko at namanhid ang dibdib ko sa mga sinabi niya. Mabilis akong umiling at humikbing muli.

"Please..." he added. "I want you to just embrace me. I wan't to feel you the whole time alone"

He took me in his arms and held me against his chest. I'm too weak to move for myself.

I felt his hand over my glossy hair. He's hushing me like crazy when he's the one who is hurting me at the first place.

"I love you" he whispered between my sobs. "I'll never leave you"

Mariin akong pumikit at gustong gusto ko siyang hampasin dahil sa mga pinagsasabi niya sakin pero hindi ko maggawa. I can't believe this.

"Saksi ang buwan sa pangakong 'yan"