1994.

21. MYSTERY SURPRISE

MYSTERY
SURPRISE

JEONGGUK'S POV

                               TIME FOR HIM was in slow motion. hands wavered in front of his face as he laid back on taeyong's couch, laughter from his friends bouncing back and forth from left to right and he felt so different. he'd got drunk many times before but this time, he felt like death was ghosting him with a teasing grip around his throat.

"jeongguk, you alright?" jimin laughs from beside him, perched on yoongi's lap.

jeongguk groaned, bottle gripped tight in hand, and sat up, "i'm fine. completely fine," despite his groggy state, he took large gulps of his vodka with no hesitation; stupid really since he felt it all bubbling in the pit of his stomach, but what did he have to lose anymore?

thinking of dying only made him laugh.

a phone rang from a different room and the sound made jeongguk groan again, holding his head with his spare hand whilst sitting up proper. jaehyun pushed his boyfriend off of him to motivate him to answer it, the chuckling other trailing off with marijuana smoke in his wake.

jeongguk wondered how they could be so happy despite all they had been through.

even namjoon and jin were going strong, possibly the strongest they've ever been; jin had been there for namjoon's loss and vice versa, always having each other's back.

he felt alone.

jin had namjoon, jimin had yoongi, mijin had a girl every night, but jeongguk? he practically had no one.

one of his fingers trailed against his new neck tattoo, haphazardly tracing the dark cursive and wincing when having touched a sore spot. it was just like her: sickly sweet. he'd often stare at the ink in the mirror when washing off remnants of the night before in the morning, to only tear up remembering the last time he called her that now bitter word.

sweetheart.

how sad.

taeyong entered the living room again, "hey jimin, hoseok needs you back at his. sounds pretty urgent."

the mentioned male stuck out his bottom lip in a pout as he lifted himself from yoongi's lap, "okay well, i'd better get going. you lot coming?"

jeongguk didn't say anything; in all honesty, he didn't want to go. he wanted a break from it all, just one night yet again to let demons devour his few scraps of sanity. what more could he do?

yoongi gave a little chuckle, "me 'n guk will come later. just gonna finish up here if that's alright?"

"yeah that's fine," jimin smiled; mijin didn't say anything, just followed him to the front door in silence, "stay safe okay?"

everyone agreed but jeongguk, only nodding at yoongi in gratitude.

time to drink some more.

— 雨 —