1994.

26. MOONLIT RELIEF

MOONLIT
RELIEF

JEONGGUK'S POV

HE STARED AS the moon's gentle touch graced her soft features, a crescent's kiss to her cupid's bow. they laid in a spare bed in hoseok's spacious house after sharing another intimate time between them: they wanted to be close, to relive their honeymoon romance yet again. jeongguk was still wide awake as raesun slept, naked bodies pressed together in solitude with her head on his chest and his eyes trained on the ceiling.

his hand rubbed at her bare back, a frown stitched upon his face. there was a large fear inside of him that if he fell asleep, the dream of her returning would end and he'd be left brittle and broken once more.

the mere thought of her disappearing with the stars tore his heart in two.

images of her blood on his hands, of her eyes closing for seemingly the last time, red and blue lights amongst his blurry vision... a nightmare of the past, really. laying there, with her right next to him, made it all seem fake — when was he going to wake up?

his sniffles woke her up, her shifting to look up at his paled face. inwardly he had smiled at the sight of her messy scarlet hair, the constellation of tear stains on either cheek, the soft pout her lips always carried: how did he, a rebellious wreck, find someone so beautiful?

"you should sleep sweetheart," he whispered, combing her hair back from her face with trembling fingers. the nickname that slipped past cracked lips of his had pained him, since it had been so long ago when he had last called it her.

raesun shook her head, a small tug at the corner of her mouth to form a pathetic smile, "i'm trying, i just can't. not when... when i..." she simply shook her head again after giving up with her words.

he stared at her for a moment, letting the silence between them grow around their cold bodies. earlier, he had seen the scar created from hana's shot, and cried whilst kissing the rough skin — the guilt was still there. it choked him at night, clogged up his heart to let him suffer: it was all his fault.

"i missed you," jeongguk mumbled whilst trying to calm himself down. though he knew breaking down in front of her was fine, and that she'd understand, he didn't want to expose her to the rawest and most vulnerable side of himself yet again.

biting her lip, raesun's face had turned sad, cocking her head to the side as she looked up with empathy. his eyes scanned the way she nibbled at the toughened skin of her lip and instantly brought his hand to release the flesh from the trap of pearly whites.

"didn't you learn not to do that?" he jokingly tutted at the turned–shy girl.

"and didn't you learn that i'm not gonna listen to you?" she laughed as she pulled herself on top of him, their legs intertwined and hearts in line.

the quiet atmosphere had returned, jeongguk only concentrating on the dewy shine on her sad face and the feel of her heavy heartbeat pacing against his own. he played with the curls that had been dyed ruby, admiring how the colour matched the subtle pigment flushed in her cheeks.

it really was as if she was a dream.

"i've been told you've not been... yourself lately," she mumbled, a stray finger tracing the scar on his cheek. he nodded, and raesun sighed, "you shouldn't have let yourself get like that baby."

jeongguk rose his other hand to hold it over her own, the size comparison almost comical, "i... i couldn't help it. i tried... to sober up a–and keep a level head, i swear. but it was so hard sleeping at night to see you either dying or still breathing — both versions haunted me. eventually i just... gave up on being sane."

the girl on him frowned, the finger trailing down to outline his swollen lips, "i'm here now. i'm sorry for not coming any sooner, i just didn't know where you were."

"it's not your fault," he tried to smile and surprisingly, his mouth obeyed, and she ended up smiling back, "i've been everywhere, really, chasing after those fuckers who took you from me. i couldn't live knowing you... you..."

he didn't want to speak of death any longer because she was there. right there, in his arms, and he didn't need to dwell on the fact that she was seemingly gone forever.

"i can't believe they tried to make you all believe i died," raesun shook her head; it was starting to become funny that she had 'died'.

through his sickly–sweet smile, he spoke dark words, and the irony battled inside of his chaotic mind, "i'll kill them all. just for you. fuck... i... i needed you so bad sweetheart."

the relief in their souls was lit by moonlight, their kiss solidifying their unity once more.

— 雨 —

hi again it's me

back at it with 1994

btw im gonna try n update this more but i aint promising anything lmao

lots of love,
starr