Shawn Mendes One-Shots

If I Can't Have You

A/N: Am I late? Pretty much lol then again I'm always late. I wasn't going to but the song is still stuck in my head (cuz it's a whole ass bop and I love it) and it created this whole concept in my mind and I thought I'll just write to get it over with. Also got a little carried away with the length lol sorry. Kind of a different interpretation of the song but hope you guys like it! x

P.S. And Yes, I will be working on Part 2 of 'Words Cut Like Knives' since a lot of you guys want it so that'll be out soon!

Summary: A whole lot of miscommunication, pure in denial, cowardliness, few more months and a song later, Shawn finally realizes that everything means nothing if he can't have you.

Warnings: None but Typos

Word Count: 7k+

-:-:-:-:-

Shawn shouldn't have went with it, better yet, he shouldn't have suggested it in the first place. He knew from the very beginning that it was probably a bad idea, but he couldn't resist himself, couldn't resist her. He never could when it comes to her.

So when she was complaining and ranting about how embarrassing it was that at her age, she was still a virgin, or "inexperienced" as she'd worded, and that she just wanted to get it over with but it was hard because she wanted to lose it to someone who she truly trusts, Shawn proposed an idea that he knew would eventually haunt him.

"What if I show you how?" The words had come out of his mouth before he could even stop himself. Shawn doesn't know if it was because of the alcohol he'd consumed earlier, or the way she just looks so irresistible in her simple sleep shorts and her–well, his oversized shirt.

His long time best friend, (Y/N), halted her movements, wide yet curios eyes staring back at him as if she hadn't heard him correctly. "What do you mean?" She asked slowly, heart racing as her mind thought of so many things in a span of a minute. Though she already knows a bit of what he was suggesting, she wanted to be a hundred percent sure that what's one her mind was the same thing that's on his.

Shawn shrugged, fingers picking at the white material of his couch where they were seated, the movie they were supposed to be watching was long forgotten as his eyes landed behind her, the beautiful view of Toronto at night staring back at him. He took a few seconds to contemplate the thought in his head, weighing in the pros and cons of what he was about to suggest and then settled for: it won't hurt to try right?

He heaved a deep sigh, bottom lips caught between his teeth before meeting her gaze again. "I mean, if you want to get it over with, but only if you're a hundred percent okay with it, I can help, with your inexperienced-ness I mean."

(Y/N) still stared at him with the same amount of surprise from before, her eyes showing how she puts two and two together until realization took over her whole face, a mixture of hope and fear glimmering in her eyes but Shawn only saw the fear, his mind jumping straight into a conclusion when she spoke. "Shawn, do you have–"

"No! It's not like that. You're my best friend, I love you, and I care about you a lot but not like that, I swear." Are you sure it's not like that? Shawn felt his cheeks heat up as he looked down, knowing that his inner voice was probably right no matter how much he says he doesn't see her in that way.

Because let's be honest here, (Y/N) has been the most amazing and kind-hearted person to have ever graced his life, who's been there for him through it all and has never doubted him even when he was doubting himself. To top it all off, she's breathtakingly beautiful in every way, a timeless beauty that Shawn just can't stop but be in awe of her every single time. Whether it's just her in a casual sweatpants and shirt or when she dresses to impress every ogre occasion.