Written in Blood

XXVIII . Vengeful idiocy

I can feel my senses return back to the dusty cliff side, the air is heavy and thick, but cool. It bites at my cheeks.

The princess and I are still practically glued together, and her trembles have only gotten worse, it's starting to make me shake too. She's wracked with sobs, clinging to my shirt, her breath is coming out in short, hurt gasps. She's trying to compose herself again. But it's to no avail.

Out of nowhere, still in a mess of emotions, there's a part of me that needs to help her. I don't know what to do.

I'm starting to feel lightheaded and I know Zelda's got to be having trouble breathing at this point. Everything about this is just ridiculous. Crazy. Almost criminal.

I coax her lips off of mine, leaning my head away from hers so I can look her in the eye.

Calling the princess a wreck would be an understatement. A very gross understatement.

Her cheeks, eyes, and nose are all a bright red, inflamed by my actions. Tears soak over cheeks and big globs of the stuff still run down the sides of her face.

Then there's her eyes. I remember them always being so expressive, the only sign as to what she was truly feeling. They're bloodshot and the blue pops out, jagged and painful like shattered fragments of ice, deep and troubled like an upset sea.

The princess looks absolutely devastated. Crushed. Broken.

I'm torn over how I feel.

Turns out I don't hate her as much as I show. I don't want to see her so upset. I'm back to square one, back to loving her so much I'd save an entire nation for her. That's why it hurt so much when she sent me away, that I couldn't stay.

I guess it was there all along, the love stuff, buried somewhere dark so I wouldn't have to think about it, letting myself scorn and resent her more and more, but I'm still too confused to believe it. I can't really love her? Can I?

Another part of me sees this reaction as warranted. Completely fine. I guess that's my vengefulness. It's righteous anger though, to me. I'm not ready to forgive her yet.

It's so frustrating, I'm still mad about what she did, and yet I still love the psychotic bugger anyway. And I don't even want to start thinking about what to do about Malon. She deserves better than someone like me, someone who is always faithful. It's almost hilarious in a pathetic way now that I think about our small little flick. I was delusional, I was just trying to distract myself. What is she going to do to me? Whatever it is, I deserve what she has coming.

I reach my hands up to her wet cheeks, trying to wipe the tears but it's like trying to dry off Lake Hylia. Her entire face feels soaked.

She starts trying to talk, but it's just a load gibberish. It sounds like an apology, but I don't know. Heck, it could be an accusation for all I know. She is my superior, after all, I didn't even consider that before I yelled at her. No foresight, as usual. Impulsivity is a curse. The princess will probably grill me later for that. Does it count as treason?

My nervous laugh is barely audible over her sobs, "Hey, it's okay, just take deep breaths." I hold my tongue against any snarky comments.

I can see her start to heed my words, making a conscious effort to start slow down her breaths that are just one step away from being hyperventilations.