тнe paѕтorѕ ѕon |ѕlυмpтacιon|

14

I rolled my eyes.

I'm tired of people telling me how to live my life. I'm tired of people telling me how to feel.

I walked off.

I didnt wanna be around anyone right now.

I heard Jah calling my name but I didnt care.

I kept walking and walking until I didnt know where I was anymore. My phone began to ring it was my sister honestly I didnt want her stressing out.

I texted her telling her I wanted to be left alone.

"I wanna be alone right now sis, see you in a bit."

I kept walking until I reached the woods. I sat down on this random ass rock and cried like a little bitch.

I hated my life.

Things were so great before and just because I don't like the opposite sex I'm wrong? I'm going to hell cause I'm attracted to men? No.

I always felt this hate that my father had towards me. He didnt make it obvious when my mom was around but when we were alone he made it clear.

My father never wanted me.

He never loved me.

If I'm not worthy of my fathers love I guess I'm just not worth loving at all.

I felt my phone vibrating what point of I wanna be alone don't these niggas understand? I grabbed my phone out my pocket and seen it was Jahseh calling.

why is he calling me?

I turned my phone off I just wanna be left alone. I put my phone in my pocket and began to think of the passed.

My father was a pastor but behind closed doors he was someone completely different.

For someone who's supposed to be a pastor hes caused me pain. Pain that no one would ever know about cause I'll forever keep this to myself.

-flashback-

monday night we came home from church. it was bible study and my father was the one who was teaching the class. I usually pay attention but I was tired as hell.

My parents had me doing so much shit cleaning cooking doing chores. sometimes my parents treated me more like a maid then their son.

I ended up falling asleep until bible study was over. My mother woke me up and I went straight to the car. I wasn't tryna talk to anyone I was too tired and didn't have any strength to talk to anyone.

I went to go walk towards the car and to my surprise my parents were behind me. Usually they take forever and start talking to everyone but I wasn't complaining.

We all got into the car and as my father drove off I began to fall asleep until my mom woke me up.

"Stokeley, tomorrow you sleep in."

"Why?" My father questioned her. "There are a whole bunch of things that need to be done tomorrow."

"He's our son not our servant! I can cook and clean sometimes and you can do your own damn laundry for once! He's exhausted look at him!!" My mom shouted!

"I'm the one who wears the pants and pays the bills so what I say goes it's that simple."

I wanted to tell them both to shut up but I didnt wanna be disrespectful so I rolled my eyes and looked out the window.

I hate when they argue.

Cause then it goes on and on.

They could argue for days and it was pretty annoying.