The Outsiders: A Girl in the Gang

Chapter 18

Note to Readers:  Sorry I've been taking so long to update, but I'm almost done with this story and I have an idea for a new one as soon as I finish this one.  Hope you like it!

        We were halfway to my house, I'm pretty sure Johnny's house was the other way so I don't know why he was following me, but I wouldn't know.  Like I said, I never talked to Johnny much, so I didn't know where he lived or much about him except for that he was quiet and had shitty parents.

        I had quit trying to stay ahead of him a while ago, I didn't think he'd say anything more, and we were now walking side by side down the sidewalk.

        But then he said, "You know Pony's been pretty miserable since Monday night."

        "Yeah.  So?" I asked a bit rudely, feigning innocence.

        Johnny was silent again for a while, but then he said, "He wouldn't tell me what happened, but I know it had something to do with you two.  He really likes you," Johnny said, looking at me, and I thought I could see hope in his big black eyes.

        Now it was my turn to not say anything as guilt overtook me, remembering our whole conversation that night.  Without even really thinking what I was saying, I replied quietly, "I know. He told me."

        The minute the words were out of my mouth I wanted to swallow them back up, but a part of me felt relieved to finally be telling someone.  I mentally kicked myself, I was going soft and that was not a good thing in our neighborhood for someone like me.

        Johnny spoke slowly, choosing his words carefully.  "Do you......maybe......like him back?  Is that why you've been avoiding him?  You're scared of being in a relationship and......and......" he paused for a second, swallowing nervously cause I was glaring at him suspiciously, but then with a deep breath he continued, "And trusting someone?"

        Right then, I hated Johnny Cade and admired him for how clearly he saw things.  That's not what I said though.

        "No," I shot back immediately, but the most gullible person in the world could tell I was outright lying.  Johnny knew it too.

        Seeming a little braver now, maybe cause I wouldn't look at him rather than glaring at him like I had just a little while ago, he said, "You should give him another chance.  Ponyboy really likes you, and I think you like him too, at least a little bit, even if you don't want to admit it."

        Wow, that was gutsy, at least for Johnny of what I knew of him.  I looked at him curiously, I never knew how wise someone so young could be.  I was about to open my mouth and say I'd go right along with what Johnny had said and give Ponyboy another chance, but I snapped it shut with a click of my teeth when we stopped in front of my house.  Dally.  Dally would never allow it.  Dally would get mad at me yet again and probably kill us both.  Dally......why did I care so much what Dally said?

        Pony was right, even though l thought I did something about my brother always controlling my life and telling me what to do, I didn't really.  That was the whole reason why I wouldn't go out with him, besides what Johnny had said about me being scared to trust anyone.

        Putting all that aside though, did I really like Ponyboy Curtis, enough to maybe go out with him and eventually love him......wait, I was not going to start thinking that far ahead.  Did I like Pony?  I was surprised the answer was yes. I was even more surprised when I said it out loud, and Johnny knew exactly what I meant.

        With a smile he headed down the street, calling a happy, "Bye," over his shoulder.

        I was left standing in front of my house feeling confused yet thrilled and determined to tell him that tomorrow morning.