Summer Of Secrets Revealed

The Phone Call

I woke up with a jerk, my heart beating fast. I breath in deeply, tieng up my hair and looking around, convincing myself that I was just in my room, no where else. I look around once I'm calm and remember that Harry had stayed with me last night. I look at the time and know that both of my parents weren't home; my dad being at work and my mom was out doing whatever moms do on Sunday's.

I hear noise coming from the bathroom, which must be Harry if he isn't in here with me now. I get up and hide behind my bedroom door as he comes back to my room. I cover my mouth to stiffle my giggles. I see him tip toe in, a confused look on his face when he notices that I'm not laying in bed. I run and jump onto his back, wrapping my legs around his waist and putting my arms around his neck. I hang on tightly as Harry gasps in surprise.

I kiss his neck, laughing as he swings me from his back to his chest. I wrap my arms and legs around him tightly, feeling Harry wrap his arms around me to make sure I don't fall.

"I was wondering where you were." he says after he recovers form the shock.

I smile and get off of him, feeling the nightmare that once haunted, me leave my mind for now. I smile up at him, not wanting to end the moment that we were so caught up in. I feel Harry's back pocket vibrate and sigh, getting down and sitting on the edge of my bed. I watch as he answers, not coming to sit next to me. He whispers into the phone, not making eye contact with me, and moving a little farther away. I figure he needs space and grab my own phone, paying a game to pass the time. 

I notice after a while that he stepped out of the room, and decided to take the opportunity to change. I grab one of my sweaters and a pair of shorts, throwing them on while leaving my hair up in a ponytail. I go down and make myself some breakfast, chewing slowly and taking my time.

I look up to find Harry looking at me. I could tell he wasn't really watching me, his eyes were fixated on me while he was lost in his thoughts. I get up and go to him, holding his hand gently as he returns from being lost. I smile at him, not bothering to say anything, because the curiosity was killing me at this point.

"I'm sorry, my aunt was just calling." He whispers, intertwining our fingers.

"Is everything alright, Harry?"

"Yeah, of course."

"I meant with your aunt." I say, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He doesn't react, just staring straight ahead. I tell him to sit and he does, I offering to make him something to eat. He tells me he isn't hungry, but I know he's lying. Just like I know that something's happened, something with his aunt. I promised I would give him space, though, so I coudln't ask him. 

I jump when I hear his phone rings, breaking our silence. He doesn't meet my eyes, only gets up and tell me he's leaving, that he would see me at school tomorrow. I walk him out, grabbing his hand before he walks down the front steps. 

He turns to face me, a sad smile on his lips. I lean up to kiss him, surprised to feel his cheeks rather than his lips. I pull away, trying to smile up at him, but not succeeding. I just wanted to be there for him, like he was for me. But boys always seem to be stubborn, and there wasn't anything I could do to change that.

I watch him leave, waving slightly as he speeds away. I close the door with tears in my eyes. Why couldn't I be there for him? What was so wrong with me that I couldn't keep anyone close? Why couldn't I keep people in my life? Did everyone really think that I wasn't good enough to keep in their lives? Was I that much of a bad person?

And before I really let all of my thoughts sink in, I decided to just leave. Go for a walk. Take a hike. Do anything to save myself from pitying myself. I grab my shoes and put them on, closing my front door and locking it. I started to walk, not caring about the destination, only caring about distracting myself enough to get away from these thoughts. 

I end up going into town, walking through the stores and talking to some familiar faces. Some of them start conversations, but others treat me like they always do; rude and uncaring. I guess Harry's helped me with opening up, and I'm less afraid of what people think.

And that is what's getting me so worried. Harry's changed my life so much, and all I could do for him was watch as he went through something horrible by himself. Which got me started on thinking about if we were actually dating or not. It seemed like we were, and everyone thought we were, but it wasn't as if we talked about it. I mean we've practically told eachother that we were in love with one another, but we didn't have an official title. I didn't want to start the cliche talk on 'what are we', though. I guess we are what we are. And if Harry were to walk out of my life in this moment, I would be grateful for everything he's given me.

I'm distracted from my thoughts when Jamie walks into the clothing store that I'm currently in. She's by herself, but I notice how her eyes are red, and it seems like she had been crying. She goes to the manager, who starts to talk to her in a low voice. She starts to cry again, talking louder until people begin to look at them both.

"Please Lily, I can't lose this job. This is my first time being late, it will not happen again, I promise." Jamie pleads.

"I know that Jamie, but you've been unstable lately. I can't risk losing customers because you don't know how to leave your problems at the door. Please pick up your things and go."

I watch as Jamie leaves, her head hung low. I follow her out, catching her arm before she gets into her car. She doesn't move my hand from her arm, she just looks at me with tears running down her cheeks.

"Jamie, I know you don't like me, but are you okay?" I ask.

She doesn't say anything at first, just staring at me. I see guilt when I look into her eyes, which fill up with more tears. I raise my eyebrows, waiting for any answer that she'll give me.

"I never said I didn't like you, Autumn." She tells me, getting into her car and driving away.

The statement confused me. She was the one who had tormented me for as long as I could remember. She was the one who gave me the scars on my hip. She used to make my life a living hell, and now she admits that she liked me, or didn't exactly hate me?

Maybe something was in the air today, something that everyone sad and morbid. I was alone once again, with no one to talk to. I was alone with my thoughts, and alone with my nightmares. I guess I would never get used to the feeling of being lonely. 

But as I check my social media sites after a day of loneliness, I had a surprising friend request. It was from someone I never considered a friend, bit I couldn't turn away. So I accepted it and stared at the words until they sunk in.

You are now friends with Jamie Harris.