[HIATUS] "Proof that Loki has a heart" (Loki X Reader fanfiction)

Haribo

"I heard she was some kind of monster.. I can't believe she joined the Avengers" says ????
a different voice replies to the woman's voice, a man, this time

"Yeah, she should be a laboratory rat instead of playing the Heroes.. oh wait she already is" they both laughed in harmony,
the woman starts speaking again "And she is the guard of Loki, even the Avengers really thinks she is useless", they continue laughing.

I'm in my cell, I'm not even crying to those reflexions anymore, I just smile, It's the only thing I can do since my tears are dried.

It's been 2 month precisely, I'm starting to think I'll never get out.
My team mates, even Loki did not visit me.

In Today's experiment I will have to poison someone with a plant, I'll probably use Water Hemlock.
I'll have to put that in a man's mouth so that he dies.

They just want to see if the toxic plants I make appear are stronger or weaker than the real ones.

They make me hurt people, maybe the guards are right, even I don't believe how I joined the Avengers, and they don't give a dime about me, even Loki the man I love doesn't care about me.

A guard takes me out of my cell
"You're hurting me, douchebag"
I said while the guard holded my arm aggresively,

he got pissed off and punched me in the stomach
"Shut up" he shouts.

I did not eat at all today, so there's nothing to throw up anyway.

I stand up and whisper in his ear despite the pain in my stomach

"When you get home at midnight, you'll ignore your wife and children and go up to your room, call one of your superiors and threaten to reveal a secret about the S.H.I.E.L.D. to the whole world if they don't give you money"

He's laughing, and so am I by the way.

I discovered a new feature in my power of persuasion, I can tell them something and they will do it later if I tell them so, example when they'll go home.

I discovered it when I asked something from a guard who brought me food, I asked her to bring me Haribos in secret from her house the next time she brings me food.

They are not allowed to bring food from outside.

The next day I got a package of Haribo, I had to hide the package well so that people doesn't suspect anything.

We finally arrived in the room, he throws me into the room and I fall to my knees, at someone's feet, at the feet of the person I was supposed to kill.

I walk away a little, always on my lap and I look up, it was her, the woman who brought me Haribos.

They had discovered that she had brought me candy. 
 
Candy.

Impossible....  I hide my face in my palms and whisper "not possible" several times, I finally decide to look her in the face, she was the only person who was kind to me and now I had to kill her, she looked desperate, she whispered prayers.

I get up with the help of the wall and then I approach her, I had no choice, and suddenly she starts screaming

"Get away from me, you monster!"

Monster....  I remember Loki and a smile appears on my face, I put my hand on her mouth and make her eat that Water Hemlock.

I walk away of the woman and repeats the symptoms in my head

"The first symptoms of water hemlock poisoning are drooling, nausea, vomiting, wheezing, sweating, dizziness, stomach pain, weakness, delirium, and uncontrollable bowel movements, trouble breathing, followed by convulsions, heart problems, kidney failure, coma, and death."

I look at the camera and shout "She'll die in a little 15 minutes"
At least that's what I thought, she died in 5 minutes, suffering, right there beside me.

I saw her in pain.
I can't even mourn her death, I'm used to it now.

The door opens and I see the douchebag look at me like I was a monster, I can feel him freaked out.
He takes my arm gently and when we come in my cell he leaves me in it.

I see the pack of Haribo's,
I remember what happened a minute ago, why can't i cry?
What did they do to me?

I shout "Give me back my feelings you stupid bastards" to the guards outside.
They ignored me.

I remembered Loki,
His smile, his eyes...
He looked stunning that night.
Will I ever see him again?

I touch my lips and close my eyes, I remember the taste of his lips, the way I felt, the wind that was stinging my hot red cheeks, his hand on my cheek.

I smiled.
"I hope he changed and gained his freedom, I hope he'll get me out of here"

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Author's note:

I hate my fucking self lmao
I hope it wasnt too harsh ksksk