Would I still choose you?

Would I still choose you? (Being Edit)

I'm Ezra Juliet Fitzherbert I'm half american and half filipino I was born in America and live my life in there for like 10 years and yes, marunong ako mag tagalog and now I'm already sixteen years old. People used to think that I'm smart but I know to myself that I'm not smart enough to understand them, They think Im kind but I'm guessing I'm not 'anymore' I have porcelain skin which I really hate because I want to be tan I envy pure Filipino's skin. I have long wavy brown hair, and I can say that I have a beautiful face and a body to kill, it's not narcissism it's just a matter of fact. People use to say insecure people seek for attention, while confident people get it without even trying, well I could say that I'm a confident one and the insecure one at the same time because I'm confident at everything but seek only one... his attention, I feel so imperfect around him so nothing when I'm with him but I have all the guts I'm scared at nothing except of losing him even if he's not mine. Let me introduce this guy who makes me keep asking myself all over again "Would I still choose you?". I was eleven years old when I met this guy named Reinniel James Lancaster this is the first warning don't ever, ever dare fall in love to him 'cause if nahulog ka sakanya tuloy tuloy na, wala ng bawian, hindi mo na mapipigilan, at ang masakit don. He'll never try to catch you, kahit gaano ka tindi at ipilit mo na iparamdam kung gaano mo sya ka gusto ay hindi nya rin mararamdaman he's freaking numb! and I'm trying to win his heart for like five years! ako na ang nanligaw! shame on me! but I only get 'nothing' as I said wala syang puso, he's so damn dense. He's the same as me he grew up in America too. He's popular because he's smart and don't forget that he's charming he's not a snob type actually he's kind, he's everyone's friend, he's the school representative to everything and he's my number one.. His my lover but I'm not his lover, He's my Romeo but I'm not his Juliet. Before he came I was on top. I'm the number one then suddenly he stole the spotlight 'effortless' he stole everything from me including my heart.. Wala syang tinira sakin, I'm all drain. He took my place as a number one and he made me number two at school at everyone at everything without him knowing. He even made me choose him first before my self. He's a fine guy I like everything about him his clean cut dark hair, his brown eyes that everytime na mag tatama yung mga mata namin nanginginig ang buong pagkatao ko, but I won't let him see that, my heart always skip a beat for him. His long eyelashes that I would trade mine just to have his. His pointed nose that make me want to rub mine against his. His white skin that easily turns red when he's exposed to sun and It's pretty cute. I like the way he walk, the way he talk, the way he fix his hair, the way he move, the way he smile the way he is. There's only thing I hate 'bout him. He see me the way he see everyone. He see me as a friend just like he sees everyone and I want him to see me as someone who's different who's worthy. yung mas mataas or kahit nga mas mababa sa kahit na sino ok lang! I just want him to see me differently. I want him to feel something to me, hate me or love me, both are in favor. That's why I decided to do everything for him to see that I'm different, na wala akong kagaya na wala akong kapantay na iba ako sakanila and what I am right now is all because of him. The good one became evil. He's always at my choices and I will always choose him. But would I still choose him till the end? even if it means I have to break the rules, myself and everyone?
Do I even love him? or I'm just a real selfish?