A Summer Story

Happiness

Happiness

2nd week of August

I sent it last night.

I said "fuck it" and just...

Sent it.

It was the best feeling ever.

Finally having having that off my chest.

Then I woke up.

He said nothing.

2 hours later.

Nothing.

I felt very sad at first.

I had no idea what I did

To deserve this.

Then I saw a picture of conor.

And I though it was Zander.

It felt like my heart was bruised.

Three layers of pain all at once.

I sat in my chair for a while feeling sorry for myself.

Then I had a sudden surge of motivation.

It was weak,

But it was enough to get me off my ass,

And I found clothes,

Got myself in the way,

That it's okay.

I saw a picture of mason,

He was with Zander, but he wasn't in the shot.

But surprisingly,I wasn't sad.

I was happy.

Happy that I wasn't holding him back.

Making him sit around the house wondering what to do.

I was happy he was living, even if it was without me.

Maybe in a month he would say goodbye,

Or come back.

But I said good bye.

And I'm satisfied right now.