Paper Scars || camren

Chapter Three

"Look. At. Me." Her voice faltered.

Lauren took a deep breath and directed her glance downward. She heard Camila stifle a sob which brought tears to her own eyes. "I can't." She put her head in her hands. "I'm sorry." Her mind teased her with the memory of how emotionally damaged before the break she was. She couldn't let herself get that bad again. She refused. "I'm sorry." She repeated. She turned to walk away but felt Camila grip her arm.

"No." Camila stated. "Don't walk away. Not again."

-

Lauren scoffed, still facing away from Camila. "Try to remember all the times you walked away from me." She yanked her arm back and walked into the rehearsal room once again. Dinah, Ally, and Normani looked at her questioningly. "I can't do it." She simply stated. "I'm really trying. I'm sorry."

"We're sure getting comfortable with that word." The girls redirected their gaze to Camila who had reentered the room. "Let's just get back to work."

The girls rehearsed for the rest of the day with neither Lauren nor Camila saying anything. Both of them were hurt and they, along with the other three girls, didn't know how they were going to deal with it.

-

It was late. Lauren tossed and turned in her bed, unable to get to sleep. It'd been like this ever since the incident. But tonight, it was worse. She looked over at her mom who was sleeping peacefully and decided that fresh air would help. She quietly maneuvered out of the room into the silent hallway and made her way to the elevator. Pressing the button to lead her to the top floor, she took the remaining stairs up to the roof. The fresh air hit her quickly, relieving some of her anxiety. She remembered the nights on hotel roofs that she used to spend with Camila, which were all happy memories. Despite the situation between them, Lauren closed her eyes and reminisced. She remembered their bodies tangled up together under hotel sheets they dragged up there. They would try to see the stars but couldn't because of the street lights, so they would make up formations.

"Lauren?" a soft voice spoke. Lauren immediately knew who it was. She dismissed the memory and remained facing away. Camila put her hand on her shoulder and Lauren couldn't help but smile at the touch. "Hey." Camila breathed. "What are you doing up here so late?"

"I couldn't sleep." Lauren admitted. "I've been having trouble for a while." She continued still facing away.

"Remember when I used to have trouble sleeping?" Camila smiled.

"It looks like you still do."

"Yeah, well." Camila paused. "I remember you used to stay with me up here until I fell asleep. Don't you?" Camila continued when Lauren didn't reply. "You would bring the sheets." She giggled softly. "And you would tell me, 'You're beautiful, Camz.' You would. You would say, 'You don't need beauty sleep, but you deserve it.'"

Lauren sighed, "I remember. I remember all of it."

"You were the best friend I'd ever had." Camila smiled sadly when Lauren turned around.

Lauren had a tone of frustration in her voice. "Friend? I was your friend? Is that it? You're forgetting some very key points in those nights, Camila. Who are you trying to hide from now? It's just you and me up here, and you can't even admit it. You can't admit that we were more than friends." She raised her voice. "Who are you pretending for now?"

Camila tried to interject, "Lauren, I—"

"No, Camila. Stop. It's nothing new." Lauren waved her hands in disbelief. "But I think I've heard enough." Lauren walked past her with tears in her eyes.