guilt | kihyuk

June 3rd, 2018

Kihyun was looking around that place, it didn't feel like home anymore. Now that he was missing everything felt different. It used to be Kihyun's favorite place to be, he could spend plenty of times with Minhyuk here. But now that he is alone, what is left for him to love about this place?

Kihyun's mind went crazy with thoughts telling him that he was not welcomed here anymore. Not after what happened. He opened the front door and sat there observing the neighborhood. Without even noticing Kihyun felt a tear of water drop on his face, it was not raining though. It didn't take long for him to realize he was actually crying. Being there, rekindled everything on his mind and memories from that day haunted him every second.

After some time, Kihyun got up and went back inside looking around as if he was discovering the place. His eyes stopped their track on the door, that door. He had been refusing to see this room for so long. Kihyun's heart was aching just by looking at the door but deep down he felt the need to open it and enter this room after all this time.

Kihyun took a deep breath and gathered his courage. He walked to the door and stoop in front of it wondering if it was a good idea to go in there. His hand made contact with the doorknob and immediately Kihyun stepped back, afraid. He can't do this.

Hours had passed and Kihyun finally decided to quit staring at the door and eventually open it. I can do it, Kihyun kept repeating in his mind. As soon as he opened the door, Kihyun was blown away by the familiar smell of his lover, one that he hadn't forgotten although it had been too long since he last encountered it. Unable to move Kihyun looked around seeing all that reminded him of his gone lover. A piece of paper pinned to the wall made him lose it. On it was written "I love you forever" it was simple yet it reminded him of that day he made that note for Minhyuk and the smile that appeared on Min's face as soon as he read it. Kihyun missed him, he really did, but it was too late now.

For the second time today Kihyun started to cry, impossible to hold back his tears. He ran out of the room carefully closing the door behind. It hurt too much being in this room.