In This Love

It Can Get Better

I love you" I heard Sarah giggle into the phone after saying that endearment. It was strange to me because the way people around us say "I love you" as if it doesnt hurt.

I looked over my shoulder and found Rhys looking at me, as if he was thinking the same thing.

I couldn't help but remember last night.

    Flashback

I picked up a shot glass and gulped it down. Rhys sighed and did the same, I played with my engagement ring wondering why do I wear it all the time even though it has no significance whatsoever.

My mind wanted to ask him something related to that.

"What does "I love you" mean to you?" I turned towards him after asking. At first, Rhys frowned, his lips curved into a small smile later.

"The only real love that I know about is the one between a father and a son. When a father tells their son that he loves him. He's teaching that child two things; one, that kind of love will grow as they both grow. They both will show it in their own way. Two, that it's okay for boys to Express emotions. Despite of my dad teaching me these things as I grew up, but I never seemed to let vulnerable parts of me to be seen by anyone" he looked at me this time.

"Until tonight, here I am with you. Letting you see me break and heal when I can't deal with words, reality, fate" my heart skipped a beat, it was true that tonight was something where our minds and heart were like an open book.

"That's really something" I told him as I realised that I didn't really have my share if motherly or fatherly love, growing up and even now.

"I never got that" I whispered, but Rhys grabbed my hand instead of saying something to make me look at him. But he didn't look at me.

"You have Ridge" he smiled.

My response was me squeezing his hand lightly

"So, in my opinion. "I love you" isn't a promise. It is the epitome of what two people have made together in time. "I love you" is like the final brick that is left to be put in to complete a building. The building, is the relationship of the two people who love each other" he finally answered. I smiled at what he said though my definition was really different.

"What about you? What does "I love you" mean to you?" He asked as he let go off my hand, I immediately put my hand in my lap with a frown thinking he didn't want to hold it anymore.

"I love you?" I took a sigh and ran a hand through my hair.

"It is a promise" he looked at me with a smirk and said "but?" I smiled back and replied "It's a promise of heartbreak"

He threw his head back laughing like a little kid.

Didn't know if it was the liquor making him feel this way or my statement was so close to reality that it was something inevitable.

"Close to reality, I like it" he said complimenting my answer.

    End of flashback

Being back to reality felt good, staying in the memory would bring internal conflicts back and I wasnt in the right state of mind to deal with that.

Sarah and Alex were sitting on the floor playing with Cassian while Rhys and I sat watching them.

What are you supposed to do when something so important to you is lost? When you have no hope that it will ever come back. That's why I hate hope now it breaks you when you expect too much from life. For life, it will let you down at one point in life or two.....or three.